The lies you love, p.23
The Lies You Love, page 23
Walking up, I see the construction happening in the building next to mine. “I bought it,” he says when he sees me peering into the front glass window. “As a grand gesture. As a way to be next to you every day of my life even if you won’t have me in your life. I’ll always be close to you and there will never be another woman for me, Auden.”
I lose my breath. “You’re putting your practice here?” I ask, unbelieving.
He shrugs. “There’s this well-loved and well-established pet store right next door and my business adviser told me it was the best spot in town to move my practice to be closer to home.”
I get butterflies. Like some lust-crazed teenager.
“You might not believe I’m the right choice for you because I’ve made mistakes in the past, but I’m never, not for one second, going to let you forget what it feels like to be next to me. You want to marry that dude to keep your conscience clean, do it, but I’m going to be here. Waiting for the day you can’t deny we belong together. Waiting for you to stop living a lie because, Auden, I’m never going to stop loving you.”
“You bought this? It was for sale? Seriously?” He’s right. I’ll never be able to escape him. I don’t want to.
“Come look,” he says, extending an arm.
“Let me say hello to my employees first.” I’m visibly sweating my nerves are so high. This is the decision; it has to be. I bring Pork to Marcy and hand her the leash. “I’m going to be next door checking out the space. The new owner is here.”
“Oh, we saw him. He’s been asking for you for the past three days.”
I clear my throat. “He’s a friend,” I explain.
Marcy grins all gums. “Yeah.”
I cast a look over my shoulder and head next door. The front room is obviously being transformed into a waiting room because there’s a big slab desk and wires coming out of a hole on top for computers. The loud hammering is coming from a room in the rear. I poke my head in and see a worker knocking hardwood into place. From the looks of things, it’s almost ready to open. Maybe even next week. There isn’t time to think about what this means for me, for my mind, it’s happening at warp speed. “We can put a door on the other side of that break room. It leads to your backroom.”
“Does it?” I ask, letting the moment carry me away. “You did this to be close to me? Really?”
“I’ve done a shit job of holding you. In fact, I spent time a lot of time talking myself out of you when I knew from the second I laid eyes on you that I wanted to be close to you.” He exhales, and he looks tired. I’d fathom a guess he’s as tired as I am. “Do you accept my apology?”
I nod once. “You sort of chained yourself to me. I guess that might be the most apt apology in the history of time.”
“It needed to be more, and nothing I could say would speak as loud as action. I know why you said yes to him.” Beck looks down, a haunted look passing over his face. “Is that what you want or would you entertain other offers?”
I smile, but he’s still not looking at me. “This isn’t a game show, Beck. It’s my life.”
“It could be our life.”
“Are you making me an offer?” I ask. He pulls me into what I can only assume will be an exam room. The wood floor is finished in here, and there is already an exam table and a sink in the corner. Less than a week until opening I amend in my mind. Beck locks the door and spins to face me.
“It’s an offer you want?” Beck asks. “I wasn’t prepared to do this right now, but damn it, I don’t want to waste another second.”
He gets down on one knee. The scent of sawdust and cleaning products seeps into my senses, branding it a new kind of wonderful if he’s about to do what I think he’s going to do. Beck reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny plastic bird charm. It’s a cardinal, I think. I remember it from the necklaces I carried in my store. It’s a charm from one of them. Beck extends it to me. “I found this on the windowsill after our first night together. It’s been with me ever since that day.” I take it from his hand and roll it around in my hand.
Super glue is holding a wing on. “Looks like it’s been through hell.”
“And back,” Beck says. “It’s all I have on me right now that means anything, but I’ll get you any ring you want, or I’ll pick it out myself if that’s what you want. Auden, whatever you want, just marry me. Be mine forever. Let me be the one to grant you your dreams.”
My throat thickens and my face reddens. This is how it was supposed to feel when Peter asked me to marry him. Undeniable attraction—not an ounce of hesitation in saying yes. Not just attraction to the person, but to the idea of forever with a person that completes me in all ways. I feel it in my bones, trickling through my veins. “You’ll always be a part of me, Beck, so we might as well make it easier on ourselves. I love you so much and yes, I’ll be yours forever. Will you be mine forever, too?”
He stands and takes me into his arms, the warmth and connection immediate and visceral. I can smell him. Pulling back, I look into his eyes mere seconds before his lips crash into mine. The taste is familiar. It’s right. There’s no other way to describe it. Being held by him feels like every happy memory all at once. My body calls him home, and my heart, well there’s never been a question who it belongs to. It happens quickly now that first touch is a thing of the past, his lips trailing a hot, seductive trail to my neck and shoulder blade before he’s halted by my shirt. I pull it over my head, unfasten my bra, and strip off the rest of my clothes. I’m vibrating with need. For connection after the drought of his worshipping hands. He loses his clothes and still keeps a hand, his face, something, on his body against mine. “I wasn’t sure I’d ever get this back,” he says, tilting my head back with both hands. “This feeling. Like I’ll never get enough of another person. You. Are. Everything. To. Me.” His lips brush mine as each word caresses my lips in an angry plea.
I’ve never been everything to someone, and there should be a little trepidation in filling that role, but there’s not. “You’re everything to me, too.” His grip on my face tightens and his tongue dips into my mouth possessively. I feel weak in my surrender. Beck’s hands are on me and when he touches me, it feels like there’s no one else in the world. It’s him and I and the electric fire of our love. I lose my breath when he picks me up and sets me on the edge of the examination table. Beck smirks. “There will never be anything more beautiful on this table than you.”
I smirk. “Not even a Lhasa Apso?”
He shakes his head, pulling my ass closer to the edge. Spreading my legs with both hands on my knees, his smile is absolutely feral. Licking his lips, he lowers his head and goes down on me, slipping a finger inside me as he licks a furious pace on my clit. The hammering continues at a steady pace so I don’t mute my cries. I feel everything, every flick of his finger and tongue, even his huge, warm palm on my thigh as he pulls me closer. He owns my body as he finger-fucks me and brings me to the cusp. Peering down at him, I try to rationalize how I got so lucky. He’s so beautiful, his muscles push and pull as he aggressively seeks my orgasm. I lose my breath the second the tingles shoot down my legs and I come apart, coming around his finger.
He doesn’t move for several seconds after the waves subside, and then he pulls his finger out slowly, planting a languid kiss at my sopping wet core. When he brings his finger into his mouth and sucks, my pussy clenches. “I missed that,” Beck says, dragging his lips across my stomach. “I missed that a lot,” he corrects.
I exhale noisily, catching my breath. “Not nearly as much as I missed it,” I say, running my tongue along my bottom lip. “Not even my battery-operated boyfriend makes me come that hard.”
“Oh, I have competition?” he asks, raising one handsome brow. “A challenge, is it?”
I shake my head. “Not even close to a challenge. I’ve never, not once in my life, been so easily influenced into orgasms as I am when you’re heading the game.”
He presses his lips together and his abs flex as he stands to his full height. Still shaking, I hop down. Beck steadies me, holding onto both elbows. Glancing up, I push my lips to one side. “I think right now, I’d like to head this game.” Returning the favor, I drop to my knees and pull him into my mouth. I slide his cock all the way in and draw it out slowly before spitting on the tip and adding in my hand. His hand is gentle on my head, not guiding or pushing, with just enough pressure to urge me on. His moans are soft and full of conviction. He missed this just as much as I did. When I taste him, my stomach floats—a needy anticipation filling me. I work my hand and lick around the ridge before pushing forward to take him into my throat. His girth makes it hard to keep my teeth in check, but by the sounds and curse words coming out of his mouth, I seem to be doing a decent job.
“You keep this up and I’m going to come inside that pretty little mouth.” At his words, I let my lashes flutter up to glimpse his face. I drink in the sex-hazed smile he flashes underneath hooded eyes. The man oozes testosterone, and man, do I want to lap up every single ounce. Eyes locked on his, I swirl my tongue around his shaft before tonguing his balls. I draw one in my mouth and gently use my lips to caress it. Beck’s hand on my head tightens as he pulls my head away. He groans loudly, “Time to fuck.”
Licking my lips, I stand and he kisses me violently, passionately, with every ounce of his soul. I’ve never met someone who was able to make me feel so much with a kiss. It’s as if he’s speaking this love language out loud, without words. I will myself to give it right back until my lips are sore, and my heart is beating at my core, rasping to be filled. When he breaks our mouths apart, I whisper, “I love you.”
His gaze boring into mine, I can envision our future, taste it like it’s already here. It’s more than I dared to dream for myself. Or at least, it was a dream I watered down over the years because nothing ever seemed to go to plan. Nothing seemed to pan out. I diluted the main dream when life jaded me in college, and then again after my accident, and once more when I didn’t think I’d ever have Beckett like this again. I was ready to settle for the next best thing because at least if I had that, it meant I had something.
“I’m going to show you how much I love you.” He picks me up and sets me on the counter, thrusting his cock inside me in very precise and well thought out alignment. Wrapping my legs around his back, I put my hands on the counter to brace against his pounding. He watches me through lust-crazed eyes where we connect. The sight of him obsessing over disappearing inside of me is so hot that chills break across my skin in a rush of pleasure. The angle and tilt of his dick rubs my G-spot every time he slips back into me, creating a frenzy of satisfaction, though too fast to make me come, but quick enough to build toward the end goal. His gaze catches on mine and holds, and I see it again, the truth in his love and the absolute adoration I never knew I had any right to possess.
I clench around him and explode in ecstasy, gripping his thick shaft as he works my clit with his thumb, providing that much more relief when the orgasm rolls on and on, a seemingly endless bout of satisfaction. Too much time has passed since I’ve had Beck, and every nerve is on end, reverberating with excitement. “That was a lot of love,” I pant out as he tilts his hips gently, rocking into me.
“It will never be enough.” His voice is strained. “How I feel about you. It will never be enough. You’ll never understand what you mean to me.”
“If it’s a fraction of what I feel for you, I get it.”
“Can I come inside you?” he asks, voice trembling as he holds back, waiting for my answer.
I nod once, and that’s the only affirmation he needs because he leans over and kisses me while he fucks me. The sounds he makes in my mouth are deep and guttural sounds of passion. He fucks me rotten—his muscles tight as I cling to him trying to stay put. Beck buries his face in my neck as he releases, coming deep inside me. He doesn’t move when his cock stops twitching. He stays buried, and I’m glad. “That felt incredible,” he says against my neck. “I’ve missed you, Auden. God, I’ve fucking missed you.”
“Not as much as I’ve missed you. Let’s never be apart again,” I say.
He shakes his head, keeping his forehead pressed against mine. The moment is intimate and terribly raw. “I’m so sorry. I’ll spend the rest of our lives making you the happiest woman in the world.”
I move my hips to create friction. “Lucky for me, you have just the tool to do that.”
“However you want it, baby. Forever.” Beck kisses me and stills while I get myself off once more for good measure. He kisses me softly and moans into my mouth with deep satisfaction when my pussy grips him. We clean up and dress slowly, watching each other’s every move, giddy we’re back where we belong. Together.
Beck shows me around the office, pretending we didn’t just rock each other’s world. I notice my face is still pink when I pass by a large mirror. His hand in mine, he stops when I stop. We look at our reflection and he kisses me on the top of my head. “You’re beautiful.”
I grin. “Right back at you.” Sighing, I turn to look up at him. “This worked out so perfectly. It’s hard to believe everything is falling into place. Everything seemed so messed up.”
Beck’s gaze hardens for a moment as he thinks of something. “I lost the best part of myself when I lost my sister, but somehow I managed to gain it back. Auden, it terrified me to feel about you the way I did. Then all of a sudden people were giving me a reason I felt the way I did. Like, it wasn’t my decision. Fuck,” he says, exhaling. “Maybe it isn’t my choice and this was always going to be.” His eyes turn molten. “I’m okay with that. I’ve found peace and I’m glad you’re still here. Still mine. That you’ll be with me forever.”
His eyes glass over and I hug him as tightly as I can, winding my arms around his body like a vise grip. There’s a freedom in this feeling, this love that is reciprocated and whole. “Forever,” I agree. The little bird is poking me from my pocket. I take it out as I loosen our embrace. The sharp angles poke into my hand as I close my hand around it and thank Maisey for giving me this chance and Ramsey for helping us in her nefarious way. Beck might have been assigned a different Principal in a different city if it wasn’t for her. Everything worked in our favor, and yet we stood in our own way. Until now.
Beck kisses me again, then goes to tell the contractor he’s leaving and to call him when he’s finished for the day so he can come back and check the progress. He also tells him to check the fire codes on putting a door to lead to my store. “You’re never going to be able to get rid of me,” he says, waggling his brows. “Plus, I don’t want to leave you to work.”
“Dr. Fallon,” I say, smirking. “You really did it.” I look around. “This fits you.”
He smiles. “I know.” Beck grabs me by the waist. “We have a whole bunch of people waiting at home to know if my plan worked to lure you into marriage.” He chuckles. “I should call my parents right now.”
I nod, and then my stomach sinks. “I need to talk to Peter.”
“I already did that,” Beck says. “He is a good guy. Not good enough for you, but good.”
“What did he say?”
“He was pissed, don’t get me wrong, but he got it. He knew what was best for you. He said he gave it his best shot. I know how upset I’d be if I were him.”
“I need to apologize,” I reply. “I never should have said yes.”
“I agree with that,” Beck says.
“Go get Pork. We have a ring to pick out.”
I smile and rush into the shop to get Pork. Elation. Love deconstructed and reconstructed, like my heart. We rush into the day, two people in love, choosing each other, forever.
EPILOGUE
Beck
If you told me this would be my life in the future, I’d call you a liar. I have a permanence I never thought to seek. Auden is rubbing Daisy Mae’s back so she falls asleep quickly. She has a magic touch that gets our daughter to sleep in record time. I don’t have the same skill, but I can make her eat vegetables by bribing her with candy, which I count as a superpower even if no one else agrees. Her birthday party was yesterday and I don’t know much about other people’s four-year-olds, but I’m certain ours is the best one. We had an enormous turnout. My parents flew in and Auden’s parents live next door. Stefan came with his new wife and Betty with her new husband. When this house came onto the market, we pounced and haven’t looked back. The commute to work isn’t all that bad, and we get to ride together.
The pet store and my practice are now one booming business. A door wasn’t enough, so we knocked down the wall separating the two and it’s the only specialty boutique like it in our area. We bring Daisy Mae into work mostly because neither of us can bear to leave her home with her grandparents, even if they’re the most amazing grandparents in the history of the world. They love her like she’s their own, and our support network couldn’t possibly be stronger. After our wedding, we left the past in the past. It’s crazy to think about how we met, fell in love, and the things we endured now, but those are the things that made us stronger.
Auden’s pregnancy was difficult. Though I’m certain she went through hell, I was just as worried because through all of the complications, Auden was only ever worried about the health of the baby growing inside her stomach, and I was worried about losing both of them. The day she was finally born and both were declared healthy, I took the only deep breath I had in months. This is what complete feels like. This is what happiness looks like. This is what love can do if you let it. When I stopped hiding from who I was and stopped being afraid of what would happen if I embraced the life I wanted, my life actually began.
She closes the bedroom door softly, smile big, and all for me. “She’s out! What should we do?”
“I have a few ideas.”












