The lies you love, p.15
The Lies You Love, page 15
Mom breathes heavily on the line. “She’s not answering, Beck. Dad is calling her over and over.”
“Where is Stefan?” I ask, barely recognizing my voice. As I stare at the screen, desperately trying to find my sister in the mix of bodies streaming in and out of the shattered glass windows, a weight settles in my chest. Somehow, I know that nothing will be the same after this moment.
Mom exhales noisily. “He stayed back in the office today. I talked to him before I called you. He was trying to get answers. They weren’t working together on this audit.” She speaks the last words slower.
My hands shake on the phone, and my pulse is hammering against my neck. “I’m going down there to get answers.”
I hear my dad mumble something in the background. “They said the robber got away. Don’t go over there, Beck. It’s dangerous.”
“I’m going to find Maisey.” There’s a finality to my voice and Mom doesn’t argue. Or won’t because she’s that worried. The bond I’ve shared with my sister since the day I was born is something no one messes with. She always watched over me until I got so big it made sense for me to start looking out for her instead. I chose a college that had a good veterinary program but was also only a twenty-minute drive from her because I needed to be close. I hang up the phone and decide against driving because traffic is bad. I lace on my tennis shoes and go for a jog. It should be about ten minutes quicker than driving, except my pace picks up automatically. This isn’t a normal run where all I focus on is breathing, my thoughts are torrid as I think of the scene on television. It was chaos, yellow tape, melee, words like casualties, victims, and death. My breathing is ragged, and I’m sweat-slicked when I reach the edge of the scene and the law enforcement has it cleared more than what was showing on the news when I left. There’s a reporter and his cameraman packing up his van. There are some ambulances driving away, and medics are covering a man on the ground in the lobby of the bank with a sheet. Slamming my eyes shut, I force myself to use actual words.
“Who were the victims? How many?”
He nods at the ambulance where they’re wheeling a gurney. My heart leaps into my throat when one of her hands falls off the narrow bed. “A lot. That one is still alive. Are you missing someone?”
I shake my head because this can’t be real. I just had lunch with her. We have plans to go camping this weekend. I was going to bring my new girlfriend. Maisey said it would be the test if she was the girl for me. We were going to study together even though she knows jack shit about animal anatomy, she’s helping me study for my final next week. She’s there for me in every way and infiltrates every molecule of my life. I stumble as I approach the back of the ambulance where my sister is. The only reason I know it’s her is because of the sleeve of her shirt hanging off the side. It has brightly colored birds covering it, and I gave her hell for her wacky fashion choice at lunch.
“Sir, step back,” a paramedic says.
“That’s my sister,” I roar, ignoring them, grabbing a bar on the side to hoist myself up. There’s blood covering her. It’s on her face, the white parts of her shirt are soaked red, and her light brown pants are saturated. My stomach heaves. “Maisey. Maisey,” I call out, heading to the head of the bed where another paramedic is trying to stop the bleeding to an injury near her shoulder. “Can you hear me?” They tell me to sit down because they’re heading to the hospital, and I do as I’m told, without removing my gaze from my sister. It’s not anything I ever thought I’d see.
There is rattling behind me, and the door slams closed as the ambulance takes off. Even as my stomach lurches, I can’t look away. “Is she going to be okay?” I ask, but no one answers, they’re too busy pumping an IV filled with medicines. Her eyes flicker open when I call out to her, head barely turning so she can glimpse me. Falling closer, tears prick my eyes. “Maisey, it’s going to be okay. You’re fine.”
Her lips pull thin. “Beck,” she croaks. “I love you.” She didn’t know it at the time but with those three words Maisey associated love with death.
I swallow hard but can’t say it back. Too final, too real. “It’s going to be okay. They’re fixing you up.” I grab her hand and wrap my other hand around her bird-clad wrist. So much blood. No one else gets it. No one else gets me. “You’re okay,” I say, except it comes out as a sob. “You’ll get better.”
The paramedic’s eyes meet mine, and I see the truth, but he doesn’t give her that. He leans over and lies to her instead. She smiles at his words. Her lips are sleepy and serene. Maisey squeezes my hand. I get closer to her, and with my lips pressed close to her ear I whisper, “I love you.”
Everything crumbles after that—after I say goodbye. The monitors beep and the people scramble for different bottles and equipment. Maisey says three more words before her eyes close, and her face is covered in the oxygen mask. “He spoke French.”
****
“Maybe one day you’ll tell me,” Auden says, pulling me from the nightmare. “Or never is okay too.”
I clear my throat and calm my racing thoughts. “One day,” I agree. I could have done something. I could have saved Maisey. If I weren’t in such a rush to finish lunch and get back to studying, she wouldn’t have been at the bank when the robbery happened. I alone am responsible for what happened to my sister.
“I am technically a veterinarian,” I tell her. “I graduated college and got through my residency. My heart wasn’t in it anymore, so I changed career paths.”
Her gaze is soft and probing, but I can tell she’s shocked. “Because of what happened to your sister?”
“When the recession hit and there was a call for Charge Men, I decided to take the opportunity to protect the innocents who were wrapped up in a villainous world.” I look away. “Yeah, it was mostly because animals and medicine reminded me of her. It was hard.”
Auden hums. “You don’t even seem to like animals.”
“You own a pet store and you don’t have a pet,” I reply, grinning because I know she’s looking at the side of my face.
“Fair point,” she says. “Will you ever go back? Be a vet?”
The pit in my stomach from recalling that day hardens. It will be there all day. “I don’t know. My family probably wishes I would.”
Auden sits up. “Let’s take a walk along the stream.”
Sighing, I sit up and everything feels painful. I grab her hand. “Do you think you’ll ever get a dog?”
“No,” she says. “They’re only a liability. Everyone loves their dog and then they die. The thought of it is enough to never get one.”
I squeeze her hand. “Isn’t that the whole point? The good news is that nothing lasts forever. The bad news is that nothing lasts forever.”
She looks over at me. “And the in-between?”
“The in-between is the only safe part,” I admit.
She raises our linked hands. “This is the in-between?”
When we’re in the tree line, near the stream, I stop. “I don’t know what this is anymore. I’ve stopped trying to label it.” Cradling her face in my hands, I lose my breath, and a little of the sadness goes away. I kiss her, and I forget the nightmare, at least for the moment. “Hold that thought,” Auden says, pulling away from the kiss, her pointer finger in the air. “I’ll be right back. Don’t move.”
Grinning, I cross my arms and nod. She runs back to the campsite and comes back with the air mattress on her back. I make a move to help her, but she shakes her head and calls for me to stay where I’m at. She’s so tiny, and it’s a cumbersome shape, but she makes it back to the bank.
“What are you doing with that? We have to sleep on that tonight.”
She grins. “We both know you and I don’t sleep, and I have something in mind. Something I’ve always wanted to do while camping. I need you to go along with it. Agree?”
“I suppose I don’t have much of a choice, plus I have a feeling there’s something in this for me.”
Her giggle is music to my ears. “We need to take this to the lake in the clearing. Now you can help me.”
“Wait, Auden, public sex is one thing, but sex on a rubber mattress in a lake can probably get us rolled up if someone sees us.” She continues laughing as we walk, me carrying most of the weight. “I’m serious. Jail isn’t a place I’d like to go tonight.”
“No one is around but us, Beck. It’s dead here.”
The lake is small and surrounded by trees on all sides. There aren’t any campsites, and I wonder how she knew it would be so quiet.
Reading my mind, she says, “I did my research.”
She starts taking off her clothes on the bank, her feet sinking into the white, marshy sand. I swallow down the last of my hesitation when the light in her eyes gives me all the encouragement I need. Auden squeals as she hops on the air mattress and watches me undress. “The water is treated in case we… fall in. We shouldn’t get a flesh-eating bacterium.”
“You really did do research.”
Kneeling, she extends an arm out to me. Her smile is so big, I don’t have any other option. “I’ve been waiting my whole life for this.”
Biting my lip, I shake my head. “You are the most persuasive person I know.”
“Good. Float with me.”
I let go of the mattress and hop on. It floats away from the edge immediately and fear turns into excitement when she laughs. I grab her, lying down, propping her head on my forearm. “You’ve got a wild streak, huh, Annie?” I mutter, teasing my lips across hers.
“Annie would never do something so wild. This is Auden. Auden knows life is too short.”
A breath catches in my throat, and I press my lips against hers to hide the emotion pumping through my body. Between thinking of Maisey and being in the presence of Auden, it feels like I might implode. “Naked Truths,” I say, sliding my tongue along her bottom lip.
“Yes,” Auden says, nipping at my tongue with her front teeth.
“The idea was you wanted to fuck out here, right?”
She reaches down and grabs my cock. It’s been hard since the moment she took off her clothes—from the second I saw her carrying a mattress toward me if I’m being honest. “Do you think you can keep us on this?” Her eyes sparkle, and I lose my breath.
“My balance is most excellent,” I reply, letting my hand fall between her spread legs. “You’re so wet.”
“Keep the wetness between my legs and win a prize,” Auden claps back.
I laugh, leaning in to kiss her neck and lick a trail behind her ear over her jaw back to her mouth. The mattress rocks as I shift my weight and we both still to keep from tipping. I stoke her clit, and her hips work against my hand, greedy for more. I slide a finger in and moan when her tight pussy grips me. “I want my cock here,” I say, leaning my forehead against the side of her face.
“I want your cock there,” she says, panting between words as I stroke her G-spot. “I’ll be on top,” she adds.
I swallow and inhale her sweet scent as I draw my finger from her and wipe her wetness over her clit. As is our ritual, I always make her come before I fuck her. Always. Closing her eyes, she chases her first orgasm because she knows she doesn’t get the dick until she’s coming undone. “I want you inside me when I come.”
“And break our rule?” I ask.
“Please.” A breathy plea.
“When you put it like that,” I growl, gently moving to lie on my back in the center of our floating fuck bed.
Auden stays straddled on top of me in the center as I move, shifting her weight to keep us balanced. I settle, resting one hand on her hip. The thumb on my other hand works her nub, except I’m going harder and faster than I usually do—the need to sink into her is epic in quality. She reaches between us and lines it up as her breathing picks up. I can tell she’s close, her chest and neck are pink, and her perfect lips are separated as she pushes breaths out. Her chin tips slightly upward and her eyes are closed, her long thick lashes fanning across her cheeks. In one move, she sits all the way down, and she comes, her wet cunt clutching me from the inside over and over. The sight alone is so erotic I could come on the spot. Auden against the dark blue sky. Her body all mine. We’re nearly in the center of the lake now, the shore quite a distance away. I hold her down on my dick.
“Stay still now. Let me fuck you. It will rock less.” I have a little give in the rubber under me so I piston my hips up and down, fucking her mad, my dick sloppy wet from her, and the sounds of slapping and fucking overtake the birds, the wind, everything nature is drowned by our passion.
“Fuck me,” she calls out, running her hands in her hair as her back arches.
The sight is magnificent. I do as I’m told even as I feel my orgasm nearing, I go faster, deeper, making sure I’m rubbing her G-spot with every upward thrust.
“Fuck me harder,” she says, and I close my eyes and focus on not blowing my load.
I keep my grip on her hips firm as I throw her up and down. Her weight is insignificant as the lust-filled haze takes me over completely. Water is splashing on the sides of the mattress as she eggs me on, wanting more, wanting all. Auden leans over, sinking her teeth into my pec as she lets go again, the waves of her orgasm having an immediate reaction on me. I spill deep inside her, my cum feels like it’s coating the insides of her entire body. I can’t catch my breath, and she stays on top of me, bent over, her tongue languidly flashing out to pepper my neck and ear with caresses. Goose bumps prickle my body as the breeze floats across my exposed skin.
Auden circles her hips to feel me inside her. I love when she does this when she relishes our connection. Like she can’t believe it’s real. Because it feels so obscenely good. She can even come again like this sometimes. Just basking in the afterglow. I want to live inside this moment forever. She and I, in the middle of nowhere, floating on some lake, wearing nothing but our truths. I bring her lips to mine and kiss her as she continues to mix on my dick. A pang of terror rips through me when I recognize what I’m feeling and what it means. I love Auden, and I’m no longer associating three little words with death but forever.
Somehow that’s more terrifying.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Auden
Beck grabs my face. “They’ll love you.” He gives me one last kiss before pushing me through the front door of his parent’s house. When we were on the flight this morning, it felt like we were sneaking away for some magical vacation, but the second we landed, my excitement settled into dread. His family is important like any close family, I suppose, but with the loss of Maisey, Beck is their only child.
His mother is a late to middle-aged woman with kind eyes and a heart-shaped face. When a huge smile appears, all of my insecurities melt away. It’s Beck’s smile. A genuine, trustworthy feature that stands out in a crowd. “Oh, Auden, thank the good lord you came so I can meet you.” She greets me first before her son, and it thrills but also sends a chill of guilt through me. “You’re more beautiful than the picture. I’m Maude, and his papa, Ned, is out back in the garden getting some veggies for a salad. Please, honey, make yourself at home. Let me know if you need anything.” She hugs Beck, standing next to me. “Oh, I’m so happy you trusted us to meet her.” She tells us she set us up in his old room, and I feel weird sleeping with him, but I would never argue or make anyone’s life harder.
It is a weird thing to say, but given his profession, it makes sense. “Thanks for having us, Mom. What’s for dinner? Can we run to the store for you and Pops?” She tells him that Stefan is at the store and that we should settle in before cocktail hour. His dad comes in through the back slider covered in dirt.
“Pops! What are ya growing?” Beck says. The way he takes the basket of carrots from his hands to hug him proper is adorable. Ned’s hands are black with soil, and his face wilts with emotion as he hugs his son. When he opens his eyes and our gazes lock, his brows shoot up.
“I missed you something terrible, but who is this stunner?” His lips pull back to reveal a charming white smile as he claps his son on the back. “Never thought we’d see the day. Not these days, anyway.” He makes a deep rumbly noise. “It feels so good to have you in my arms.”
Beck compliments his garden and asks about the vegetables, and his mom fusses in the kitchen as they talk, asking me my favorite foods, and more importantly she says, what I like the least. Hands on my waist make me jump. Beck’s face is at my ear in the next second. “We have to escape now before they plan every single food we put in our mouth for the entire weekend.” He pulls me back with an arm wrapping around my waist, and his parents pretend not to see the ardent display of affection—talking to themselves instead.
He takes our bags and climbs a set of stairs near the kitchen. The main staircase is in the foyer, and it spirals around on both sides. Their house is gorgeous and it makes sense they’d want Stefan to reside there. Hell, it’s too big for a family of eight, I can’t imagine if it were just the two of them here.
“Why do they live in such a big house,” I whisper, plodding down the hallway.
When he pauses in front of a door, I already know what the answer is going to be. Dropping our duffels in the hall, he pushes into the room and stands in the doorway. If I had to guess, this room hasn’t been touched since the last day Maisey was here. There’s a broad pink canopy positioned in front of a large, arched window. There are trophies for horseback riding and blue ribbons for math club, and framed photos of her and friends lining a huge vanity mirror. There’s a dresser covered in knick-knacks, the kind you get in kid’s meals, and one wall is covered in framed bird artwork. That’s what Beck is standing in front of now, hands placed on his hips as his tortured gaze soaks it in. I pad forward and stand next to him. “She drew all these. A bit of an artist when she was a kid.” He drags his forefinger across the glass of a frame of the biggest bird—a brightly colored tropical one. “They refuse to get rid of her stuff or change this room at all. It’s why they stay in this mansion of a house when all they need is a cottage with a big yard.” He sighs, sitting on her bed, fisting the frilly comforter in his hands. “They’ll never get over it.”
