Salvaging love, p.9
Salvaging Love, page 9
She’d been trying on clothes for two hours and for every item she thought she liked, there were at least four or five that were hideous on her. But, at the same time, over those two hours, with Nat’s and Ruby’s help, she’d started to realize that the hideous had nothing to do with her, but with the fact that not every piece of clothing was made for her body. What a revelation.
Now she faced the mirror in shock. Dressed in a glamorous tight-fitting dress that came to her knees, had a boat neck and long sleeves, dipped way low in the back and was made of a sequin-like material in shades of pale gold, silver and rose-gold woven together to shimmer, Ellie felt almost sexy.
“El, come on, honey, show us the dress. Does it fit? Do you need a different size?”
“Uhm, no,” she answered quietly.
“No, what?” Nat asked. “Ellie?”
Ellie took a deep breath and opened the door. She stepped out to see her friends’ faces exploding into pure delight.
“Holy freaking cow! You are a goddess, Ellie!” Ruby jumped up and down and shrieked.
“Ruby!” Ellie hushed her.
“She’s right. You are,” a lady walking into the dressing rooms said.
Nat moved her in front of the large mirror. “Did you look at yourself in the mirror?”
“Yes.” She tried to blink back her tears. She squeezed Nat’s hand.
“Then why the tears, sweet girl?”
“I…I feel…pretty.”
Chapter Fifteen
Lachlan’s pub was packed, but Jackson wasn’t surprised when he walked in. Friday night and the music gave the feel of a tiny village pub on the west coast of Ireland. Impressive, the moody, dark wood tones, leather booths and intimate tables invited one in to sit awhile. The awesome copper bar top and antique artwork hinted at style and substance. Whoever designed this place had known what he was doing.
“What can I get ya?” the bartender asked.
“Jackson Kincaid. I’m looking for Ellie and her friends.” After another shit day of being mired in scum, it was all he could do not to hunt her down, haul her over his shoulder and carry her away to a hidden, magical island where he never had to see Anthony Lucciano again. Never had to defend the piece of shit. Now that he had Ellie’s light to look forward to, his days at the office were becoming unbearable. Work had always been his drive, the thing that filled him. He’d been fucking ignorant and frozen.
“Ah. Lachlan MacGregory. Prepare yourself, my friend,” Lachlan said and nodded toward the back booth. “The girls are tipsy.”
Jackson saw them, in the last small booth near the wall, Ellie and her friends laughing hysterically. “You’re Jackson Kincaid?” a huge bald biker-clothes-clad guy with a trim silver goatee, sitting on one of the stools, asked Jackson. “Gage Kovacs. Nat’s husband. Lachlan’s right, they’re hammered. Should be a fun night. Time to get my girl. My babies are all spending the weekend at Grandma’s house.” He tossed a few bills on the bar and clapped his hand on Jackson’s shoulder. “I know who you are, man. Gonna give you the benefit of the doubt and say I hope there’s more to you than a hotshot lawyer who defends pieces of shit, but nonetheless, I’d say this to any man interested in Ellie—take care, or I’ll have to rearrange your face.”
Jackson’s body locked. Pissed off didn’t begin to express his feelings.
Gage smiled at Jackson’s reaction. “No offense. She’s our Ellie. You may already know how special she is, but what you don’t know is that there’s something heavy inside her. Heavy, deep shit she’s never told Nat or Ruby and those girls are the closest thing she has to family. So be pissed at me but be mindful.”
Jackson studied the man. He knew Ellie’s dad was a piece of shit, but from what she’d told him, her dad wasn’t the heavy or the deep shit, and yet there were hints that what Gage said was true. He could get angry or he could respect the man for looking out for her. “I’ve got her.”
Gage slapped him again, this time with a smile. “Let’s go get our ladies then.” Lachlan followed them over to the booth.
“Is that your hottie?” Ellie’s friend gasped when they approached. Ellie giggled. He liked seeing her with her friends, letting loose. That was until her friend’s demeanor changed when she pointed at him. “You! I’m mad at you. Don’t think you can buy all these buildings and tear them down. I won’t let you.”
“Heard there was a new owner,” Lachlan said and crossed his arms. “Figured a hotshot would swoop in and morph this neighborhood from classic to snazzy, wiping out all the old charm. Is that your plan, Kincaid?”
“We’ll see,” Jackson said, studying MacGregory. He didn’t feel like discussing his business at the moment, but he could see it was important to these people. “My partner and I are also considering restoration. Either way, it shouldn’t affect your business much. From what I’ve read, your success is enviable. A huge, loyal following. Diner’s Choice Award five years in a row for Best Casual Spot and Best Cocktails and Best Live Music. Bands on a waiting list to play here. Your pub should be fine, whichever way we decide.”
“I see you’ve done your homework.”
“Always,” Jackson returned.
“But first and always, this is a neighborhood pub. And the neighborhood matters very much to me.”
“Understood.”
“If you gentlemen are going to fight, can we get another cocktail?”
“Ruby,” Ellie admonished. “We don’t want them to fight.”
“We don’t?” Ruby gazed at Lachlan. “I don’t know, I heard Lachlan’s a pretty good fighter.”
“Ladies,” Lachlan said, “I’m cutting you off. Time to go home.”
“I don’t wanna go home.” Ruby pouted up at Lachlan.
“I, um…don’t know if I want to go home,” Ellie said, giving Jackson her wide, beautiful smile. It was almost more of a question. She was even cute when she was drunk.
“Natalie, babe, you ready?” Kovacs asked.
“I wanna go home.” Nat smiled huge at Gage. “If I go home,” she whispered loudly to the girls as if the men couldn’t hear her, as if the entire bar couldn’t hear her, “then Gage can get to home base.” The other girls burst out laughing again. Natalie spilled out of the booth, but Gage caught her.
“Come on, baby. The girls are at your mom’s for the whole weekend. It’s you and me and a suite at the Westin downtown for two nights.”
Nat reached up to put her hand on her husband’s cheek. “You planned that for me?”
“You buy any new lingerie for me while you were out shopping with your girls?” He leaned in close and walked her away from the others to the exit.
Nat peeked around Gage’s huge body, waved to the girls and gave air kisses.
Jackson watched Ellie’s stunned eyes come back to him. Then she sucked back the rest of her cocktail and reached out her hand for his. He took it, said goodnight to Ruby and Lachlan and headed out.
“How many have you had?” he asked as he walked a stumbling Ellie home. He couldn’t hide his grin. It was obvious she was ready for nothing but sleep. She leaned against him when he unlocked her door.
“Oh, four, or maybe five. I remember number four. I think. I don’t drink very much, Jackson Kincaid.”
“Think I got that, Ellie,” he said, walking her into her apartment. Chewie was out cold. Buffy started to get up and he said, “I’ll be back for you guys.”
“But the girls thought I needed a little few drinks. They had important, estrmeemely interesting things to tell me about…” She started giggling.
Ellie giggling again. Fuck him. “About what?” He got her into her bedroom and angled her over the bed before she collapsed.
“You know,” she whispered. “S. E. X.”
He didn’t know whether to shake with laughter or shock. No way in hell she didn’t know about sex.
“You do know what that is, don’t you, Ellie?”
She started laughing again and he enjoyed the view. It made her expression light up and sparkle and it spread into him. “Of course I do, hot, growly Jackson.” She patted his chest, and that was damn cute too.
He was relieved, although strangely upset too at the thought that he wouldn’t get to be her only. “Right,” he said, moving down her body to get her boots off.
“Can you imagine?” She kept giggling. “A veterinarian who doesn’t know about the birds and the birds. I mean bees, the birds and the bees. Jeesh,” she said. He tugged one of her cowgirl boots off. “You’re so cute. Hot and cute. A man can be hot and cute. Do you know how cute you are? But you’re also moody. A girl could have a hard time figuring out you. I’m a girl and even though you kiss really, really, really well, and you’re hot, I’m still a little tiny confused. I mean…but I didn’t know there were so many, you know?” She threw out her hand and when he looked up she was blushing again.
He couldn’t follow her. “So many what, Ellie?”
“I’m sure you know.” Her eyes bugged out of her head again as if she could say what she wanted to say with her shiny blues alone.
He got her other boot off and leaned back next to her on the bed. “Enlighten me. What do I know, Ellie?”
She studied him, and her smile tipped lopsided before she closed her eyes and whispered, “Positions, Jackson. S. E. X. So many, many, many different positions for it.”
He put his head down on her shoulder. Kill me. Please, God. Kill me right now. He had to change the subject or leave because he wanted to do every position with her, but not while she was drunk. Drunk and confused by him. He couldn’t blame her. Last night he’d left her a bit unsettled. Jesus! He didn’t know how to talk about his past. He especially didn’t know how to explain his upcoming trip.
“How was shopping?” He changed the subject back to neutral territory.
“What?” Confusion took over her face and made her do that slow blink.
“Shopping with your girls?”
“Oh! That!” She grabbed his shirt and pulled him closer. “It was fun!” she said like she’d won a million dollars. “I never knew it could be fun.”
“I thought that was part of the sisterhood for girls growing up, to love shopping,” he said, peeling her arms out of her jacket. He was surprised she hadn’t passed out yet. Her body was limp and floppy.
“I’m not most girls,” she whispered. Her voice went straight from whimsy to sad.
“Ellie? You look like I kicked you in the gut.” Dark ghosts washed over her face.
“She said it didn’t matter what I wore. It wouldn’t ever change things. I would never be beautiful. I never did it right, never did anything right.”
“She who? Who are you talking about, babe? What do you mean never did anything right?”
“Shhhhhh.” She closed her eyes and felt for his lips. “Don’t wanna talk about it.” She’d let something slip, an important tidbit he didn’t want to let go, but now wasn’t a good time to pursue it.
“Jackson.” Her eyes were still closed, but she’d lost the sadness.
“Yeah, honey?”
“Are you gonna kiss me again like you did in the car and when you brought me home, that way that made me feel all melty and tingly inside? That way I never wanted you to stop kissing me, that kind of kiss?”
Jesus, how in the hell did he end up with such pure and honest goodness in his arms? He drank in her beauty. The flush on her porcelain skin, the freckles on her cheeks, the cute, small crookedness of her nose. The liquor won. Softly her hand fell away from his lips and she was out.
“Yeah, babe, I’m gonna kiss you again like that. But not now when you’re drunk.” He touched his lips to hers and leaned back up to get her jeans off and tuck her in. He almost lost it when he saw what she had on underneath, teal blue lacy undies. This had to be punishment for all the shitty things he’d done in life. Pure torture. He burned the sight into his brain while he tucked her legs under the covers.
“Jackson,” she said, startling him. He’d thought she’d passed out.
“Yeah.”
“That was the best date I’ve ever had. And the dancing…”
“Me too, babe. You need sleep now.”
“But I’m worried about you. I want to slay your demons too. Are you going to tell me about them?”
Pure beauty. How in the hell could he mar her with his life, not only everything that happened to him when he was a child, but all the filth he’d been swimming in for the past decade? “You gonna rescue me too?” he asked. Her face lit up in a lazy smile.
“You can trust me,” she said. “We can go, we can have another best date ever with all the kissing too.” Then she was out for good.
Best date she’d ever had? Fuck him again. He hadn’t been lying when he’d agreed with her, because every moment spent with her had been the best. She was beautiful and kind and her warmth put life into everything around her. But for her to say that was the best date ever, when he’d demanded that it was a date, stirred up a past so painful it showed in every pore of her skin, and denied her his own story, well, he had a lot to make up for.
He smiled, tore himself away from her sleeping form and went to see to the dogs.
Chapter Sixteen
Ellie peeled her eyes open and wondered if she’d somehow glued them shut the night before, because moving her lids was seriously difficult work.
“Ouch!” she shrieked when the morning light from the windows splintered into her brain.
Maybe she’d stay in bed in the dark until this serious pain throbbing in her head ended. She must be in a nightmare right now. Except, she had to pee. Ellie pulled her body upright and crawled across the bed, trying not to send blow after blow of pain through her. She got to the edge, put her feet on the floor and half-walked, half-dragged her body to the bathroom.
“This has to be a nightmare. Feeling this badly can’t be real. Oh, my God!” Ellie sucked in her breath when she saw herself in the mirror. Her curly hair had been electrocuted. She still wore the makeup the cosmetic artist had applied to her face at the mall yesterday. However, now it decorated her face like war paint. It hadn’t held up well in battle. She washed her face, the pain in her head taking on a more powerful beat, then flipped the bathroom light off and opened the door. “Definitely a nightmare,” she whispered. “A living nightmare.”
“Mornin’.”
“Shit!” Ellie screamed at Jackson standing in the doorway to her bedroom. She leaned against the wall, slid her body down and buried her head in her knees. “Wake up, Ellie, wake up. My head has never throbbed like this. I have clown makeup, Medusa hair, and Jackson Kincaid is standing there in all his gorgeousness witnessing my mortification. And I’m only wearing my shirt and underwear. What is going on?”
She felt him sit down next to her on the floor and peeked up at him. Holy freaking crap! And she’d said all that out loud. She buried her head in her knees again. “Go away,” she said into her knees and he laughed at her. “This isn’t funny. What are you doing here?”
“I got you home from Lachlan’s, put you to bed and spent the night on your couch. I’m pretty sure that headache of yours is what most of us would call a hangover, but nightmare works too, depending on how bad the hangover is.”
“Last night I was… I’ve never been hungover before. I’m so embarrassed.”
“Nothing to be embarrassed about,” Jackson said, handing her ibuprofen and a cup of coffee. “Here.”
“Are you insane?” she whispered because it hurt to talk. She glanced at him and took the pills he offered. “Nothing to be— You… Look at you. You’re perfect, gorgeous, hot.” You like me, she wanted to say, because she was beginning to believe it and now he’d probably never want to see her again.
“And?” he asked.
“And I look like the Wicked Witch of the West got into a catfight with her flying monkeys.”
“Babe.” He chuckled, then turned her face to him and left his hand there, caressing. “You are beautiful. When you walk down the street bringing coffee to George. In your sexy yoga pants. When you’re drunk and giggling in your bed and telling me what you and your girls talked about while you threw back too many cocktails. Beautiful when you’re angry. Beautiful now. I can see by the shock on your face that you don’t believe me, which means I’m going to have to show you. But now I have to get to work.”
Ellie stared at him. She listened and leaned into the warmth of his hand. No! She remembered the girls, the bar, the conversation. “Oh. My. God,” she whispered and buried her head in his chest. “I can never face you again.”
He laughed and this time she felt it. Boy, did she like hearing and feeling his laugh. And his chest radiated warmth, like a furnace. That was it, she’d stay here, face-planted on his body, warm and happy and safe.
“Had a good time with your girls?”
“Yes,” she said into his chest. Her head shot up. “You and Lachlan almost got into a fight?”
“Babe, we didn’t.”
“What was Ruby talking about? Oh, lordy! My memory is foggy and my brain hurts. I do remember you and Lachlan talking about his pub and how your plans won’t affect him. What does that mean?”
“Lachlan MacGregory owns that building on the end. His business and the entire structure. It wasn’t part of the deal Duggan and I got.”
“Wow.” Ellie rubbed her head. “That’s why his building is in awesome shape. I think he restored the whole thing himself.”
“Yep. Did a good job too, from what I can tell. That bar is phenomenal.”
“Maybe he can give you and Duggan pointers.” She gifted him with a small smile.
“That is not a bad idea,” Jackson said.
“Are you beginning to see things my way, Mr. I-Only-Want-Brand-New-Condos Kincaid?”
“Love it when you tease me, babe.” He stood and helped Ellie up. “I called the clinic. Matt is there and he can stay until ten. Go back to sleep for a few hours. It won’t cure the hangover, but it will help.”
