Badlands next generation.., p.54
Badlands: Next Generation Collection, page 54
“Don’t I always explain, Pixie?”
The look she gave me was good enough to serve as an answer.
She understood I never revealed the cards I had or the ones I dealt until it was time to do so. I trusted her with my entire legacy and my life, but I refused to make my moves with her knowing them too. That put her at risk for anyone who got an inkling she was let in on my plans.
I’d kept her safe all these years. I wasn’t going to change a damn thing about my way doing things. It was the same for anyone I deemed as important to me. There was no pride in carrying all this shit alone, but someone had to do it.
Our next generation would step up and do it eventually, I’d accounted for everything. At this very moment in time there was only one uncontrollable variable.
Samael.
I knew far more about him than anyone else. He reminded me a lot of myself.
I would do all I could to solidify the place I had in mind for him, but there was a limit to how far I was able to go.
In the end, before things spiraled out of control, he’d either be with us or against us. I sincerely hoped he would make the right choice.
MISCREANTS
Twisted love, blood, and mayhem.
Get ready for Samael and Lilith.
One Click
Read the prologue and first chapter
PROLOGUE
Pray to the devil.
Devour flesh.
Kill for survival.
For thrills too if that’s what you’re into.
Where I come from, all of this is as ordinary as the sky being blue.
My world—the Badlands, is made up of fantasies and nightmares. Devilish and desiderate desires often one in the same. You must pick a brand of evil and dedicate your life to it if you want to survive.
Holding out hope that things will change is foolish, they won’t. No one is going to be arriving as a savior. Heroes don’t exist here, but there are plenty of villains to choose from.
You can befriend a clan of cannibals. Work the farms that skin people alive. Join some other faction that’s managing to thrive. It doesn’t matter as long as you find some form of allegiance. Very few can make it on their own.
I’d heard what things had been like before power shifted, before the depraved and corrupted paved the future for a new way of living. I won’t bore you with the logistics, you’ll get to witness that firsthand.
As for me and where I fit in?
I was born a Savage and whisked away by another. The whole situation is complicated and chaotic. Just like we are—like our story is.
Samael is as wicked as they come, the epitome of a beautiful nightmare.
Crazier than crazy.
Sicker than sick.
The only man I’ll ever love.
And my best friend.
He’s my fiercest protector, but also my greatest enemy.
I’m his peace, and his torment.
Ours isn’t a tale of benevolent, tender romance. It’s bloody and ruthless. Its pain and sorrow. At times unforgiveable and enraging. It isn’t poetic or butterfly inducing, but it is a love story.
A love story about a girl and a boy, forever tied together in a beautiful purgatory of exquisite carnage.
CHAPTER ONE
I loved bloodshed as much as the next girl. Overt displays of violence tended to make my heart race with excitement.
This—what had been transpiring for the past twenty minutes? It was wholly unnecessary and beginning to bore me. Not to mention the clean-up was going to be a pain in the you know what.
Rule numero six when inflicting bodily harm on another: Don’t wear your good clothes if you’re going to be sloppy.
An audible crack reached my ears as, Brody’s giant black boot connected with Jim’s face. He bellowed in pain as his jaw shifted from the impact, going abnormally far to the right.
I couldn’t see any in the glow of the bonfire, but once the sun rose, I knew I’d be able to find half this guy’s teeth scattered about. I wondered what he did to deserve this.
The newest recruits always went through a probationary period before being fully inducted as a proselyte. You didn’t allow just anyone into your faction no matter how eager they seemed. The people you surrounded yourself with would be your family. They’d be the ones at your back and by your side helping you survive.
Those who didn’t make it all the way in were almost guaranteed to end up likes this man.
Dead.
He may have been alive right now, but his death was inevitable.
Brody’s large form cut off my line of sight, shifting a second later as he undid his jeans and began pissing on Jim’s face. Raunchy laughter erupted from the other men, a few whipping their dicks out to join in.
Always so classy, these guys.
As their urine rinsed the blood from Jim’s face, he coughed and gagged, unable to prevent some from entering his mouth. An overwhelming stench of ammonia began creeping towards the pine-tree I was leaning against. My nose scrunched in disgust. Someone seriously needed to start drinking more water.
Taking this as my cue to leave the area, I pushed away from the tree and prepared to take my ass to bed, faltering when Brody moved again.
Samael’s weighted stare met mine as he approached the group of barbarians from the opposite direction.
He didn’t seem surprised to see me out this late or standing near the pits. But then, he’d always had the freakish ability of knowing where I was and when. I used to find comfort in the fact that he could find me no matter what. Now I couldn’t stand it.
I turned and kept walking, flats moving over the leaves littering the dirt path. There were only a few yards between this end of the camp and the other, sparsely separated by a thicket of trees.
Samael called to me as I rounded the first slight bend. I didn’t answer. Our last conversation, if you could call me yelling while he remained infuriatingly impassive a conversation, hadn’t gone anywhere but sour. I wasn’t up for a continuation.
I’d been doing all I could to avoid seeing him at all anymore.
A task so much easier planned than implemented when he was the equivalent of a king around here. Even when I didn’t see him, he was there. In revered whispers. Inspirational speeches. Executions.
I hated bearing witness to his uprising while on the outside looking in, but it was a necessary measure to guard an already battered and bruised heart.
“Lils,” he tried again, closer than before.
Dammit.
I forgot how fast this man could move. Knowing how irate he got when ignored, I still didn’t slow. Besides, I’d asked him to stop calling me that nearly a year ago.
I could feel him coming up right behind me. It was impossible not to when his aura was bigger than everything that surrounded us. It’d been this way since we were young. The first word that came to mind when I tried to describe it was smoldering.
His aura burned so intensely, you were damned to be trapped within it, happily falling victim to the blaze, or fighting not to become enflamed. This is exactly why I should have moved faster. He wouldn’t have been able to reach out and grab hold of my wrist, leaving me no other option but to stop walking.
“I know you heard me calling you.” His fingers held firm as he maneuvered himself in front of me, effectively blocking my path.
I tested his grip by trying to pull free, scowling when it tightened. I lifted my gaze to his, skimming over his shirt clad chest.
“What do you want?”
“Ah, so you’re at phase three?”
“I’m at what? What is phase three?”
I tried to pull away again. He tisked at me in mock admonishment. “The more you struggle the tighter I’m going to hold.”
He emphasized his point by tightening his grip even more. It didn’t hurt, but I knew he could easily change that.
As his calloused fingers rubbed against my skin, the thought of using my teeth came and went. If I bit him, he’d bite back harder. I knew from prior experience that was liable to lead to our clothes coming off.
“You don’t need to hold onto me. I’m not going to run away."
“You just were.”
“No, I wasn’t.” I lied. “What do you want, Mal?”
“Did you know you go through four phases when you try to be pissed at me?”
“One, you’re mad. Two, you’re over it. Three is where you pretend to still be upset.”
“And four?” I drawled dryly.
“That’s when you remember you’re hopelessly in love with me and nothing I say or do will ever change that.”
I kept my face blank. I was well versed in expecting the unexpected when Samael opened his mouth. You never knew what he was going to say until he said it.
Phase one through three was bull, but four? That hit much too close to the malignant truth between us.
“I am mad at you,” I deflected.
“Liar.”
“Don’t you have anything productive to do? Maybe you should go babysit those Neanderthals and tell them to put their dicks away.”
His fingers flexed around my wrist. “You aren’t allowed to talk about dick.”
I would’ve laughed, but I knew he was being serious. I pulled against his grip again, somewhat surprised when he let me go. A little confused but not daring to waste any time pondering his behavior, I continued on my way.
I didn’t make it far before his large hands were grasping my hips, easily manipulating my body so that I was facing the opposite direction once more.
I should’ve known this was coming.
Expelling a loud, exaggerated sigh, I peered up at his partially obscured face. The bonfire continued to rage from behind him, the flames casting a faint orange glow onto the path we were on.
He was sporting fresh stubble, bringing attention to a jaw line that was to die for. One strand of dark hair had broken free from the swept back style he kept it in, and now rested on his forehead. It did this often, reminding me of when I would thread my fingers through it and brush it back.
Samael readjusted his grip, purposely dragging the pads of his thumbs over the skin my midi-tank didn’t cover.
“Stop that.”
I slapped at his hands and blocked the shiver that attempted to race down my spine. There wasn’t anything I could do about the goosebumps or the way he made my stomach flip.
“You sure?” he taunted, an edge creeping into his tone. He attempted to repeat the motion with his thumbs.
I grabbed both of his wrists and held them in place to prevent him from doing anything else.
“What do you want?”
“Day after tomorrow. I’m going to oversee a run. Do you need anything?”
A run? Again? He’d just gone out two weeks ago. He was always careful about our supply grabs. I couldn’t think of a single thing lacking right now. I didn’t like the idea of him leaving the camp unless absolute necessary.
There were way too many assholes that would love to take out the infamously mysterious leader of the Stags and Lazarus.
I kept my lecture to myself, though. It wasn’t as if he’d heed anything I advised. Warnings were nothing but triple dog dares to Samael.
“I do need something…” I trailed off, playing up the small traces of innocence I still possessed.
“Which is?” he asked, back to sounding as impassive as ever.
I smiled sweetly. “My freedom.”
His grip tightened; a quiet laugh unfurled between us, causing my heart to flutter and my stomach to flip again.
“Your freedom? You’re a little too old to believe in shit that isn’t real. Do you want a unicorn too?”
“Yes, then I can shove its horn up your ass.”
““Sammy?” Dawn’s soft voice carried around the partial bend, slicing through the tension that was rapidly rising between us.
Ugh. That nickname made me want to sprint down the path and drop kick her into the bonfire. He despised being called that when we were little. Hated it. I did too. What the hell was Sammy? It sounded like something you’d call a dog.
I smiled up at him. “Your lovers calling for her pet. Be a good boy and go see what she wants.”
Catching how bitter I sounded, I cleared my throat and once more attempted to get out of his hold.
He still wouldn’t let me go.
“Something the matter?” I couldn’t see the smirk, but I knew it was there. Of course, he’d detected my disdain. He picked up on practically everything.
“I think you should be more worried about being caught in a compromising position.”
He laughed again, and easily broke free of the hold I had on his wrists. Hands slipping around, he applied pressure on the dimples in my lower back and pulled me flush against him.
I swallowed, breathing him in as I did. He always smelled so good.
Tonight, the comforting aroma of smoke and flames intermingled with his mint scented body wash. I brought my palms up to his chest to keep some semblance of space between us, feeling the outline of his physique through the shirt he had on.
Samael wasn’t one of those ridiculously muscular beef-heads that walked around with their arms in the shape of a constipated U. He was muscled and proportionately toned in a way that made you want to run your hands over every inch of him.
Add his ridiculously good looks on top of that, and you had the living breathing definition of a thirst trap.
“Maybe it’s time she learns the truth. We should let her see how hard I can make you come in sixty seconds.”
I scoffed and slightly leaned back, keeping my mouth away from his. “Do you have to be such a vulgar pig?”
“Don’t pretend you don’t get off on it. I vividly remember a time I fucked you with nothing but my words.”
I remembered that too. This wasn’t okay, though. That coming from the woman insanely possessive over him. It’d taken me a long time to get to this point, where I could co-exist with one of his bed buddies without feeling downright murderous, and then consequently trying to murder them. Sorry, Jennifer. But not really.
Regardless, Dawn didn’t deserve to be hurt because of our inability to get our shit together, especially when I considered how she came about in the first place.
“She deserves better than what you’re giving her,” I hissed, hearing soft footfalls approaching.
“You’re right. She should get all the parts of me you lost the privilege of having.”
Ouch. I bit back the reply that immediately sprang forward, determined to hide any indication that those words had found a mark.
“Was that supposed to bother me? I chose to drop my baggage, remember? I commend her for taking on the burden of such irreparable damage.”
I regretted the jab as soon as I said it. I’d gone too far. A voice in my head screamed at me to take it back, but I couldn’t. It was too late, and despite the words being untrue their venom would burn all the same.
He took a step away, letting me go with the smallest shove, his jaw clenching.
I knew I’d just hurt him far more than he’d ever let on. He was always so controlled and cynical, keeping his troubles and secrets to himself.
“You didn’t choose shit. If I wanted you, I’d have you.” He shook his head. “Your brother told me you’d never amount to anything more than a warm body.”
“I—"
“He said that I should fuck you once or twice and then drop your ass for good. And to think I ruined his life over telling the truth…”
I knew precisely which brother he was referring to, and holy fuck. That was a low blow. It felt like he just sucker punched me in the gut. My mask momentarily slipped; my throat bobbed as I swallowed.
Don’t you dare cry, the voice in my head seethed. I turned away just as Dawn caught up to where we were standing.
“Hey,” she chirped. “Um is everything okay?” I could hear the genuine concern in her voice as she picked up on the obvious strain.
I didn’t bother looking back or listening for his response. I couldn’t take seeing them together right now, and I didn’t want to dig the hole I was in any deeper. You weren’t supposed to allow words to hold power over you. You weren’t supposed to let them hurt.
And they didn’t.
They obliterated.
They burrowed into my soul and engraved themselves on the bleeding pieces of my heart. It was impossible to argue with someone that seemed to know you better than you knew yourself. Every time pointless hate spewed from our mouths, the decision I’d come to weighed on me that much more.
If we kept this up, there’d be nothing of us left when the shrapnel from our bullets finally turned to dust.
Natalie Bennett, Badlands: Next Generation Collection
