Evie interrupted, p.13
Evie Interrupted, page 13
“That’s impressive. What major?”
“English Literature.”
“So, you’re going to be a teacher?”
“A professor, actually.” With each word I spoke, my insides cringed. I was desperate to shift the focus off me. “Did you always want to be a football player?”
“Oh, no, no, no. I haven’t finished with my interrogation,” he said, placing a soft kiss on my cheek.
“Don’t you have meat to check?”
“My meat is just fine, thank you. Do you have brothers or sisters?”
I finished slicing and plating the last tomato then walked to the sink to wash my hands off. “No on both accounts.”
“That explains a lot.”
I turned toward Butler while drying my hands. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Only kids are usually brats.” He smirked.
I balled up the towel and tossed it over my shoulder. “Them’s fightin’ words, Coach.”
“There’s a lot of pent up hostility in your cute little body.”
I took a step toward Butler, causing his frame to straighten. We locked eyes, each of us waiting for the other to make the first move. I wanted him to stop the questioning. I also wanted to kiss him again. Seemed like I could kill two birds with one stone. Holding his gaze, my hips swayed from side-to-side until I was directly in front of him.
I placed my palms against his flat stomach, allowing them to travel up his torso. Twisting the soft material of his shirt around my fingers, I pulled him down toward me. Our last kiss was more playful, but this one took on an entirely different tone. Hot. Serious. Adult content. When our lips touched, there was no apprehension. His tongue slowly circled mine, deepening with each swirl. Butler’s hands started at my ribcage, slowly moving to the small of my back before reaching my ass.
The combination of Butler pulling my body in him and me pushing against him had every inch of me burning up. Low moans vibrated from his chest, mingling with my own. I had never wanted anyone as much as I wanted Butler in that moment. Slipping my hands under his shirt, I curled my fingers around the waistband of his dark jeans. A loud hum reverberated from Butler’s throat as he grabbed my forearms and pulled away.
A few seconds passed while he calmed his breathing. “Evie, I didn’t ask you here for…”
“I know, but I want to…I want you.”
“I want you, too. You have no idea how much I want you. There’s something about you… I’ve never felt this way about anyone, especially someone I just met. I want to know everything about you, from your dreams to your favorite ice cream flavor. I don’t just want your body, Evie. I want all of you. I feel like this is different…special. I don’t want to fuck it up by jumping steps.” With his hands perched on his hips, Butler’s head dropped. “I’m not even sure if I’m making sense.”
Emotion squeezed my throat as pressure built behind my eyes. Out of all the jerks in the world who would be thrilled with a one-night stand, how did the sweetest, kindest, most wonderful man fall into my lap?
Wrapping my arms around his waist, I placed my cheek against his chest. “You’re making perfect sense.” When his strong arms enveloped me, I knew I couldn’t give Butler up. At least not just yet.
We spent the rest of the night eating his out-of-this-world delicious food, complete with a demonstration on how not to waste his sauce. A top event of the evening. We easily talked, keeping the conversation light and general. He didn’t push me on any more details of my life and I appreciated his patience.
After eating, we went out to work on my car. I leaned against the side door as Butler buffed the scratch, his muscles straining against the sleeves of his shirt. It was a nice after-dinner treat.
“There. You can’t even tell there was a scratch,” he said, standing.
I glanced over at the bumper. “You do good work, Coach. You know we never did determine who was ultimately responsible for the damage.”
Standing in front of me, Butler placed his hands against the car on either side of my hips. “Oh, I thought it was a given that the damage was self-inflicted.”
“You thought wrong. I distinctly remember you parking your monster of a truck too close for comfort.”
“Gee, you’re pretty.”
I narrowed my eyes. “You’re not going to charm your way out of this.”
“I’ll let you win this one because it’s what a good host does. But remember next time you’re here, I get my way.”
I gazed into his eyes, before leaning in and placing a peck on the tip of his nose. “I better get going.”
“Let me get my keys,” he said, pushing away.
“For what?”
“I’m going to follow you, so I know you made it home safe.”
“That’s very sweet, but unnecessary.”
“Evie…”
I didn’t give him a chance to finish, quickly getting in my car and closing the door. I rolled down the window to reveal a disappointed Butler. “I’ll text you when I get there.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
Hesitating, I stared at him, not wanting to leave. Next to graduating with honors from Harvard, this had been the best night of my life. He made me laugh louder. He made me want more. He made me feel special. I wished I were able to express to Butler what these past few hours meant to me. To him tonight might be the start of something, but to me it would be a memory that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.
Blinking back tears, I said, “Orange sherbet.” He narrowed his eyes. “My favorite ice cream.”
Wrapping his hand around the back of my neck, Butler pulled me toward him and placed a gentle kiss on my lips. I watched him step back, allowing time for my head to clear before pulling out of his garage.
When I arrived home, I sat in the driveway and stared at my house. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to go in. I dreaded going in. Once I stepped inside, I went back to a life I didn’t choose. A life that stole from me, drained me, and kept me from a relationship I desperately wanted. Grabbing my phone, I kept my promise.
Me: I’m home safe and sound.
Butler: Good. When can I see you again?
Me: Not sure. I’ll have to check my calendar.
Butler: Oh, the life of a student.
I felt a ping of guilt reading his text.
Me: Thank you for tonight. It meant more to me than you’ll ever know.
Butler: Thank you for coming. It meant more to me than you’ll ever know. Goodnight, Evie.
Me: Goodnight, Butler.
The tears I had been holding back began to trickle down my cheeks. Fuck. The fact that Butler had this much of an effect on me after only a few encounters only proved, beyond the shadow of a doubt, I was doing the right thing by making tonight our finale. At some point between him saucing up my ribs and dessert, I knew I couldn’t lie to him about my life. A grad student. I could justify it until the cows came home, but the truth was grad school was nothing more than a fantasy at this point.
If I got any more into Butler, I’d be destroyed when he left. And he would eventually leave. This way, at least I had some wonderful memories to hold onto.
Memories
I poked one eye through the crack of the bedroom door, hoping the parental units were nowhere to be seen.
“Are they out there?” Maine said as she tried to peek over my shoulder.
“I don’t see them. I think my dad went to his office.”
Maine shoved my shoulders. “Then go out there and get it.”
“Stop rushing me. As long as we stay in here with the door closed, we’re good.”
“I gotta get home soon. I need time for the smell to fade.”
“All right. Hold your horses.” Straightening my shoulders, I walked down the hallway with purpose.
Stay cool, Evie.
Dad was a sugar-holic and always kept a full jar of hard candy sitting on the end of the countertop. All I needed to do was make it there, grab a handful, and beeline it back to my room without being noticed.
Maine had the brilliant idea of lifting a pack of her dad’s cigarettes for us to try smoking for the first time. We had been watching an old black and white movie in which everyone in the casts seemed to be smoking at some point. It looked cool, so we decided to give it a try. Stupidest idea ever.
After three puffs Maine fell into a fit of coughing, while I puked into my trashcan. The cover-up consisted of two parts. Part one: Open my bedroom window. It was the dead of winter and we were freezing our asses off. But it was better than being grounded by our parents. Part two: Jamming our mouths with butterscotch candy. My dad’s favorite. So here I was, creeping down the hallway in hopes of snatching the goods and getting back to my room without anyone catching me.
The house was quiet, except for the pounding of my heart, as I made my way toward my target. I cringed looking at the jar. I had forgotten it was glass. There was definitely going to be a clink when I lifted the top. The question was how loud. I could do the fast route, like ripping off the Band-Aid. The sound would be louder, but over quickly. Or, I could take things nice and slow. Again, there’d be a noise, less noticeable, but drawn out.
Placing my hand on the top of the jar, still uncertain of which approach to take, I curled my fingers tightly around the knob, and—
“Hey, Evie.” Mom’s voice bellowed from out of nowhere, causing me to fumble with the lid of the candy jar.
“Geez, why so jumpy?” she asked.
“I’m not jumpy. Why would you think that? Can’t a girl enjoy a piece of candy around here?”
“Evelyne Rose Chapman, come here.”
“Maine is waiting—”
“I don’t care. Something is up and I want to know what it is.”
Mom held my gaze as I quickly unwrapped a couple of pieces of candy and shoved them into my mouth. I hesitated for a moment before taking the first step. I wanted the candy to melt as much as possible before getting too close to her. I stopped, leaving a good five feet between us. Unfortunately, Mom closed the gap quickly.
Her lips pursed as her nose twitched. “Why do you smell like smoky butterscotch?”
“Murst be dis candly Durd got.” My words garbled.
“Evie, how about spit the candy out first.”
“Otay.” I did as she ordered, spitting the gooey goodness into my hand. “Maine and I—”
“Hold on.” Tilting her head toward the hallway, she yelled, “Maine, come in here, please!” Moments later the two of us stood in front of her, looking as guilty as two people could look. “Who wants to go first?’ Mom snapped.
Silence.
Silence.
Silence.
Mom waited and stared as Maine and I tried to communicate telepathically about which of us would fall on the sword.
“Evie…” Mom said in her lower register.
It was never a good sign when Mom spoke in a low tone. The lower it got the worst the punishment was. This was the lowest I’d ever heard her speak.
“It was Maine’s idea.” I confessed.
My best friend’s head popped up and turned in my direction. “You’re so weak,” Maine sneered.
“I can’t believe with all the information out there about how harmful smoking is to your health that the two of you would do such a stupid thing. “
“Mom—” I interrupted.
Her hand appeared right in front of my face. “I’m not done, young lady. Where’d you get the cigarettes?”
“They’re my dad’s,” Maine said sheepishly.
Mom huffed. “I didn’t realize he started back. Maine, I think it’s time for you to go home and tell your parents what happened.” She had gone insane. There was no way Maine was going to willingly tell her parents anything. “I’ll give you until 6 p.m. before I call and tell your mom.”
Damn she was good.
After Maine slinked her way out of the door, Mom zeroed in on me.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “But I only took a couple of puffs and then threw up in my trashcan.”
“It’s not just the sneaking and smoking that I’m upset about, Evie.”
“Creeps, what else have I done?”
“Lied.”
“When?”
“Just now, when I caught you literally with your hand in the candy jar.”
“I think it’s cookie jar and technically I garbled an explanation which wasn’t exactly accurate.”
“Everyone makes stupid mistakes. It’s part of growing up. But then lying about it to me…it was hurtful.”
Her words were like an arrow to my heart. I had never thought that she could be hurt by something I did. Angry, sure. But it wasn’t anger lighting up her eyes; it was disappointment. I think I would have rather had her angry at me. People get over being angry quicker. It zaps too much energy out of a person. Disappointment lingers.
Present
Opening the front door, I found the house deafeningly quiet. I put the container full of leftovers Butler had made for me in the fridge and noticed the flash of the TV in the family room. When I got down the steps, I saw Maine curled up on the sofa with Linus sleeping next to her. I would have left her alone and let her sleep over if it weren’t for the fact that tomorrow was Sunday, one of the busiest mornings at the café. Linus looked up as I touched Maine’s shoulder.
“Mmm.” She yawned, cracking open one eye.
“You must have had a rough night?” I said, sitting in the chair.
Maine raised her hands over her head and stretched from side-to-side. “Actually, it went well. We ate, danced, colored, and walked around. You know, girl stuff. Got her in her pajamas with no hassle and off to bed. The last time I checked she was sound asleep.”
“I’m impressed. You’re like the dementia whisperer.”
“What can I say? I have a knack, but enough about that. Tell me how dinner was.”
“Don’t you need to get home? Tomorrow is an extra early day for you.”
Wagging her finger in the air, she smirked. “Oh, no, no, no. I’m not leaving here until I get at least one juicy tidbit about your date.”
Automatically, a big smile crept across my face as I thought about my time with Butler.
“You. Are. Glowing!” Maine said. “Oh my God!”
“It’s not what you think. We didn’t do anything. Well, we did a little something. Maine, it was good. It was really, really good.”
“Oh my God, double reallys!”
“He’s so…everything. Funny, smart, sweet—”
“Hot.”
“That goes without saying, but there’s more to him than that. Butler is a genuine, honest, and caring person. I don’t know what words to use or how to explain.” I paused for a second trying to sort out my thoughts and feelings about a man I’d only been around a few times. A man who had my thoughts and feelings tied up in knots. “The one thing I know for sure is I’ve never met anyone like him.”
“When is the next encounter?’ Maine said.
Looking at her, I opened my mouth to speak when she cut me off.
“Evie, I don’t want to hear it.”
“Whether you want to hear it or not, the fact is tonight was a one-shot deal. It has to be.”
An audible huff flew from Maine’s lips.
“What?”
“You do this a lot, you know,” she said with annoyance.
“Do what?”
“Play out the beginning, middle and end of situations in your head without giving them a chance to play out on their own.”
My back stiffened. “I do not do that.”
“You so do that. You’ve already decided exactly how this Butler thing is going to turn out without any evidence to support your case.”
Crinkling my nose, I said, “Without any evidence to support my case?”
“I’ve been bingeing Law and Order. The point is, you’re already breaking up with him before you’ve been with him.”
“Maine—”
“I don’t mean in the biblical sense. I love you so much, Evie. It’s because of that love that I’m about to throw you some hard truth.”
“You’re scaring me.”
“Sure, your dad was a complete asshole for leaving. And Ben…I think you knew he was a dick from day one. Butler isn’t either of them. He came into your life at this time for a reason. You even admitted you feel different around him. You’ve got it stuck in your head that he’ll leave you when you won’t let him win you. At least give him the chance to prove you right or wrong.”
I stared at my best friend, not knowing exactly how to take her revelation. I knew she meant well and was looking out for my happiness. She made it sound so easy, and it was easy—for her.
I blew out a sigh. “I know you mean well, but you don’t understand. You’ve sat with my mom twice for a few hours doing fun things. If we were married, you’d be the designated fun parent. Her dementia…her needs don’t consume your life like they do mine. No matter how much I think I’m prepared for the next stage, I’m not.
“I can rattle off dates of each time I lose a little more of her. March, she was no longer able to dress herself. June, I found her in the bathroom sobbing because she had soiled herself. September, the morning she woke up and didn’t recognize me anymore.”
The tears streaming down my cheeks were mirrored on Maine’s face.
Wiping hers away, Maine sniffled and said, “You’re right, I can’t truly understand completely what you’ve been through, and what you’ll be going through. What I do know is that I see you disappearing into this world. Shoving everything aside for your mom. We both know she wouldn’t want that. She’d want you to be happy.”
“Promise you won’t let your father burden you with me. Live your life, Evie.”
Mom’s words echoed in my head. It was one of the last real conversations we had. Neither of us realized how bad things would get. At least I didn’t, but maybe she did.
“Evie, I know it’s frustrating, but you can’t lose yourself.”
“I think I already have.”
