Never losing hope, p.1
Never Losing Hope, page 1
part #2 of Always With You Duet Series
NEVER LOSING HOPE
ALWAYS WITH YOU DUET BOOK 2
Y.V. LARSON
Never Losing Hope © 2023 Y. V. Larson
All rights reserved under the International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.
Warning: the unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement, including infringement without monetary gain, is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to 5 years in prison and a fine of $250,000.
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Edited by: Shel’s Editing Services
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locations, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
This book has been professionally edited and has been combed though many times. If you spot a typo, please email Y.V. Larson directly, or reach out via social media. Please do not report it to Amazon because this could lead to the book being removed.
AUTHOR’S NOTE
Thank you for picking up my book, it means the world to me. While I would love for you to read my work, your mental health is more important.
This book is intended for a mature audience of 18+. There may be some violence, drug use, kidnapping, torture, nightmares, PTSD or other triggers. Please be aware if you have any of those triggers.
If you need a more detailed list, don’t hesitate to reach out via email or social media!
Email: YVLarson92@gmail.com
If you are still with me, there’s one more thing I would like to add. Eve’s story is just that, her story. Keep in mind that trauma is different for everyone. Evelyn is not meant to be depicted as a framework for all trauma responses and coping mechanisms.
This is simply her story of finding safety, comfort, and love from a group of guys who learn how to help her. While this book is emotional and dark, it will also focus on growth and finding joy in life.
If that sounds good to you, then I hope you enjoy the final installment of my debut series!
Happy reading!
DEDICATED TO
My Momma.
You are my soul mate.
My best friend.
The one who promised:
I will always be with you,
Watching over your shoulder.
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Epilogue
Epilogue
About the Author
Prologue
Evelyn - 18 years ago
"Momma, look!" The wind whips my pigtails around my cheeks when I look back. Flying through the air, I catch sight of Mommy running behind me. Her mouth is spread so wide in a smile. I giggle at her chasing me.
Mommy's face changes from being happy to... why is she frowning? "Eve! Watch out!" Why is Mommy yelling at me? My eyebrows furrow, and my chin quivers.
Not wanting her to see my tears, I look forward again, my feet peddling so fast now. The ground feels like it drops below me, and a squeal peels out of my lips.
It happens so fast...I'm not even sure what it was. But there's a ringing in my ears, and my knees hurt.
"Evie, honey!" Through my watery eyes, I watch Momma kneel before me. Her dark hair and comforting presence make my tears fall harder. "Where are you hurt, baby?"
"M-my knees!" A burning sensation starts on my hands now, too. "H-Hands, Mommy." My tummy swirls, making me not feel so good.
"Eve!" The voice of my friend, Noly, makes me drop my head. He saw me fall. I feel his small hands brushing away my hair while Momma checks on my knees. "Are you okay?" He sounds scared. Looking up at him from my place on the ground, I watch his curls twirl in the wind.
A giggle pops out, and I smile at him. "I-I'm okay."
"Of course you are." Mommy gives me a wide smile and says, "You're my little warrior, aren't you?" I nod and sniffle back some boogies.
"Can I give her a new name too?" Noly looks at Momma, so excited to be giving me another one.
"Of course, Bug. Evie can have all the nicknames." She pinches his cheek gently and gives him a wink.
His nose scrunches beneath his glasses. "Momma Mi told me about a bird that is so strong and can live forever..." Noly looks at me now. How would I know?
"A Pheonix?" Momma asks.
His eyes grow wide, and he gives me his biggest smile. "Yes! Evie is my little Phoenix! She is so strong and will live with me forever and ever."
Chapter 1
Ryan
The slam of the judge's hammer makes me jump right out of my skin. There was rage behind that sentencing; good for us because fuck Evelyn's dad. A door bangs closed in the back of the courtroom, making my nerves prickle with anxiety. I don't think much of it until I hear Korren rumbling out curse words.
Looking around Nolan's pale face, I find the grumpy bastard looking flustered and clutching Eve's purse in a vice grip. He catches my eye. "Eve and Josie ran out... she wasn't looking so good."
"Shit, let's go!" Amiri stands up on my other side and ushers us out of the pew. Ignoring the obscenities I want to throw at Noah on the way out of the courtroom, I follow behind Nolan, just trying not to fucking run into the crowd.
"Where is she?" Kor's panicked voice breaks through my rage-filled thoughts. Looking ahead of us, I see the front doors of the building overflowing with press and angry community members. It would be sweet how much they are supporting our girl with their signs of her name, but right now, they are clogging up the building.
Our girl is on the other side of this wide hallway... and these supporters need to get out of the damn way. Unfortunately, our initial pause looking around cost us our easy passage to the restroom. Bodies now crowd the entire lobby and adjoining halls; women flood in to use the lady's room.
"Son of a bitch!" Korren roars, his spiral evident at not having Eve in eyesight. If I'm being honest, though, sweat has begun to bead my brow, and my heart is thundering in my chest. I'd like to say that this is fine, and our girl is with her friend. Just peeing and powdering her nose or whatever women do in the bathroom. This should be fine because her dad and kidnapper are locked away now.
So why does something feel wrong? My gut is churning, and the alarm bells in my head are going fucking ballistic.
Looking over at Nol, I catch him rubbing at his chest, his eyes darting around the room. Amiri isn't any better; eyes sparkling with tears of frustration and fear. His dark skin glistens in his own perspiration of stress.
Fuck.
"Fuck," Nolan repeats my thoughts with a wobbly whisper.
"Does anyone have eyes on her?" I have to yell over the crowd cheering Eve's name. Even if we were to yell out for her, she wouldn't be able to pick out our voices among everyone else.
"No, let's just make our way to the girl's bathroom." Amiri pushes to the front of our group and takes the lead in guiding us through the shit show that has become the courthouse.
Where the fuck is the security?
After being shoved, groped, questioned, and ignored, we finally make it to the wall that was way too fucking far away. "Ugh!" I shake off my coat. "Does anyone else feel like their fucking skin is crawling now?" Seriously, I think about a million sweaty people just touched my entire body.
The bathroom door bursts open. "Fucking moveuhh!" Josie's irritated voice has my shoulders relaxing and the four of us taking a collective sigh of relief.
That is, until she comes out... ALONE!
"Oh, thank God, there you are!" She looks around at us, completely naive to the fact that we are all about to explode in some way, shape, or form. "Where's Eve?"
"Excuse me?" Korren's menacing rumble has the hairs on the back of my neck standing up. I grip Nolan's forearm in mine, whether it's for my own comfort or his, I have no idea. I just know for a fact that something isn't right.
She frowns at the tattooed man towering above her. "What? I thought she was with you?"
I run my hand through my blonde hair, not caring if it's messy anymore. A pained grunt escapes me with a gasp when another elbow jabs into my side. Perfectly fed up with this bullshit, I take over by saying, "She is not with us. You brought her to the bathroom, so where the fuck is my girlfriend, Josie?"
She blanches. And fuck if my heart doesn't shrivel up and die right then and there.
"Babe, calm down." Nolan chastises me for
"She- she wasn't in the bathroom anymore when I got done peeing," her voice wobbles, nerves fraying at being put on the spot with all the angry testosterone surrounding her.
"There you guys are!" My heart takes a hopeful beat at the sound of the parents surrounding us. The thumping organ falls flat when Mia asks, "Where's our little fighter?" My hand clenches on Nolan's arm again, and a ball of fear gets lodged in my throat at the same time it sours my stomach.
I lock frantic eyes with Korren and tilt my head towards the back door. We need to get the hell out of here. I can barely hear anything, and more people are pouring into the building. Plus, Eve knows where we parked, so if she got overwhelmed by the crowd, then she would know to meet us by the car if she needed some fresh air.
Right?
Shuffling along with our group of confused and worried family members, I can't help but feel useless. I can't make her appear out of thin air with a joke or stupid innuendo. I'm of no help... I can only trail behind like the lost, scared puppy they all joke about. I can only hope like hell that Eve is actually outside waiting for us.
She's not.
Eve is nowhere to be seen once we all burst through the back doors. Heads swivel, wondering just where the fuck our girl is. Dan and Chris walk around the few cars in the lot, only to come back to our SUV with a shake of their heads.
Mia and Shelley are freaking me the fuck out, too; both look like they are on the verge of a panic attack, and their husbands look like they are about to kill someone. The fear in the air is making my throat itch and my hands shake.
"Evie!" Nolan's wobbly voice rings out, and my heart cracks a bit more at his desperation. "Eve, you out here, baby?"
I pull my phone out of my pocket. "I'll just call her." My idea is quickly thwarted when Korren pulls her blue phone out of the purse she left behind.
"Son of a bitch!" The screen of my cell is about to crack under my punishing grip. "I knew I should have gotten her a watch to go with it!" My yell comes out scratchy and dark. The emotion and rage bubbling to the surface.
Amiri turns to Josie behind us. "When was the last time you saw her?" His jaw ticks when she looks at him with wide, red-rimmed eyes.
She twists her hands in front of her. "Um, so we ran to the bathroom because she was about to puke. She did, then I helped her swish some water and wipe her face. She was standing by the sink when I told her I was going to pee. But when I came out of my stall, the entire fucking female population was pushing through the doors. I checked the bathroom and yelled for her, but she wasn't there." A tear slips free from her lashes. "I-I thought she was with you guys."
"Fuck." Amiri swipes his hand down his face.
Jo's eyes ping-pong between us. "But- but she should be fine, right? I mean, Brent and Noah are locked up now."
My stomach drops into a splatter of anxiety on the pavement. My vision goes hazy, and around me, I not only see the realization dawn on everyone but the air shifts.
Could Eve have been right this whole time? Were there two kidnappers?
"Oh my God," Nol whispers next to me, swaying on his feet, face completely drained of all color. I latch onto his waist, holding him to me, trying to keep him in one piece, even if I am completely ruined at this moment.
Amiri's knees hit the ground. "No..." Devastation is clear across his features.
"Right, guys?" Josie's shrill screech is drowned out by our worst-fucking-case scenario.
"Split up. Right the fuck now!" Korren's roar has me jumping out of my horrified stupor. He takes off to the other side of the parking lot, telling the parents on his way to search for her.
"Come on, love." I pull Nolan along with me, attempting to silence the thundering of my heartbeat out of my ears. "Let's go look around the building; maybe she just got turned around." Even as I say it, I know I'm wrong.
He follows behind me in a numb trance, probably reliving that night seven and a half years when Eve was gone.
"Nolan. Focus," I snap when we round one of the alleyway corners. I need him to help me look for something... anything. "Baby! Look at me." I drag his face close to mine, bending down a bit to look into his eyes. "Help me look for our girl... please." My voice cracks under the weight of uncertainty.
"Yeah, okay," he whispers, a tear falling from his eye. I watch as he blinks away some of the fog and reward him with a kiss.
Gripping his frozen hand in my sweaty one, I pull him slowly behind me into the alleyway crammed with dumpsters. Looking around, I notice an exit sign halfway down the pathway. "She could have gone out that door," I murmur. Silence meets my hopeful pondering.
Glowering, I pause my slow steps and turn around. "What's wro-" I pause, terrified about what made my love look so completely and utterly fucking terrified.
His face is whiter than a sheet, with a sickly sheen. My breath catches. Nolan's mouth is wide open, his bottom lip trembling, and his eyes are completely fucking bloodshot, overflowing with tears.
"Wha-what?" My broken whisper comes out hesitant. He isn't looking at me; his eyes are trained on the ground behind me. Unmoving. Not blinking. My chest feels like it's about to rip open and leave me as nothing but a puddle of desperation and heartbreak.
I don't want to know what he's looking at. My eyes release their own tears, my heart and soul weeping at what I might find behind me.
"Hey! Did you guys find anything?" Amiri and Korren round the corner and come to a stop beside us. I watch their hope fade, only to be replaced with all-consuming fear.
"Nolan... what's wrong?" Amiri's gentle tone registers with his frozen mind enough for him to point past my hip.
I squeeze my eyes shut, wishing like hell that this is just a nightmare. That I won't find whatever is behind me. Whatever is making the love of my life completely shatter in front of me, is just a dream, and I am still at home, wrapped in a blanket with my family on the couch, napping without a care in the world.
"No." Korren's broken whisper zaps the strength out of my knees. I have never heard him sound so defeated. "No!" His roar has my eyes flying open when he shoves past me.
Nolan is still frozen in front of me, and Amiri doesn't look much better. I take a shuddering breath that does nothing to calm the terror coursing through my veins.
Slowly... I turn.
At first, all I see is Korren on his knees a few feet away, but then... my heart stops. The blood freezes in my body. My muscles and bones give out, sending me crashing to the ground, scrambling to get to Kor.
"No, no, no, no, no. NO!" Trailing tears behind me, I crawl toward our protector. The man who I know will stop at nothing to keep us all safe. Korren, the same man who is hunched over, sobbing like he has lost everything that matters in this cruel world.
The very same man who has Eve's heels clutched to his chest. Our tattooed brute whose knees are soaking up the small spatters of blood surrounding a fucking syringe.
"She- she's gone," his splintered whisper is punctuated by Nolan's piercing wail behind me. A sound that takes my soul and rips it to shreds. It's a sound that resonates in each one of us. Because... Eve's gone.
Again.
Chapter 2
Evelyn
A stabbing pain in my hip has my consciousness rearing its ugly head. It is fucking ugly because whatever the hell is going on... I want no part of it. My head feels like it's getting repeatedly hit with a sledgehammer, my stomach won't stop rolling, my eyelids feel glued closed, and something is seriously jabbing me in the side.
Groaning past the cotton feeling in my mouth, I attempt to move my arms. The best I get, though, is a twitch of my fingers. My entire body feels like it's finally given up.
What the hell happened?
Thinking back, I don't remember drinking a ton last night or throwing another pool party... no we have been too focused on the court cases. The court cases! My eyes shoot open to find myself in the trunk of a moving fucking car.
It all comes rushing back in rapid fire, making me gag. I whimper and swallow the bile back down. Brent and my dad's sentencing... walking out without Jo... retching in the bathroom... the crowd... fresh air... then... A sob bursts past my lips.
I failed. I fucking LET him take me!
Tears run freely as I think about all the ways I could have tried to save myself. But I didn't. I stood there and let him take me. When it counted the most, I couldn't be who everyone thought I was. Strong. I finally found a life worth fighting for, and I just fucking stood there.
