Tug of war, p.19
Tug of War, page 19
part #4 of Childhood Games Series
I love this man with all my heart.
I told him that earlier tonight, but now I need to show him.
Jake
I’m in the kitchen cooking breakfast for Stephanie, Toby and Sasha. I’ve been awake since six this morning after waking from another nightmare. This time, it wasn’t as bad as it’s been, and I think having Stephanie in bed beside me has something to do with it.
Stephanie and I have been inseparable since our first date two weeks ago. We’ve spent literally every spare moment we have together. I’ve stayed here more than my room on base. I love it; waking up with Stephanie giving me sweet good morning kisses before I groan about having to go to work.
During the day she’ll text me ideas she’s thought of for the baby’s room, or just sweet messages to brighten my day. And they do.
Nighttime is always fun. Sasha and Toby usually cook dinner while Stephanie and I clean up as they walk the dog. When we finally crawl into bed, and I rock her into a slumber, then I lay having a quiet conversation with our baby. It’s the little moments I’m enjoying.
Today is Aria’s baby shower, and I’m excited to see my sister. I haven’t seen her in a few weeks, and it’ll be great to see her. I know things have been different since Stephanie and I got together, so I’m going to suggest they both get together for a girls’ night next weekend. I think Stephanie and Aria could do with it.
I flip over an egg as a pair of arms wrap around my body and lips place gentle kisses down my shoulder.
“A girl could get used to this,” Stephanie says as she rests her head upon my shoulder.
I spin around and wrap her completely in my arms, kissing the top of her head. “How did you sleep?”
“Great. I slept with a really handsome man.”
I arch an eyebrow at her as a grin crosses my lips. “Oh yeah?”
She grins at me before placing a soft kiss on my lips. “Shall I make some coffee?”
“Please, I could do with a coffee,” Sasha announces as she walks into the room. She’s followed by Toby who’s not quite awake, and his hair is a wild mess.
He sits down at the dining room table next to Sasha.
“Want a coffee, Toby?” Stephanie asks as she moves out of my arms and around the kitchen.
“Thanks, Steph.”
She makes everyone a coffee while I plate up breakfast. Serving it on the table, I take a seat next to Stephanie, and we dig in. It’s a quiet affair as everyone enjoys the food.
“So what have you guys got for Aria and Simon?” Toby asks.
Fuck, I forgot that I needed to go shopping for that.
“We got a few items of clothes for the baby, a gift voucher that she can spend on anything she wants. We also got her a spa voucher to get her nails done before the baby comes; a little something for her. I also got something for Charlotte too, so she doesn’t feel left out,” Stephanie answers. She looks at me with a smile.
She thinks of everything.
“What about you guys?” I ask.
“We were thinking of waiting to see what she got today and then ask her what she really wants.”
“That’s a good idea.” I stand and begin to stack up the plates. I carry them to the kitchen and place them onto the bench, then turn around.
“You cooked breakfast so Sash and I will do the dishes,” Toby says carrying the cups in behind me.
“Thanks, bro. I gotta go have a shower and get ready for the party.” I race away up the stairs only to find Stephanie is already in the room making the bed. Sliding my hands onto her hips, I spin her around and crash my lips onto hers. I gently pull her towards me and slide my hands down her body. She groans into my mouth, making my cock hard.
She pushes away from me. “I’m not complaining about these kisses, but you need a shower, and I have a few rental properties to look at. Knowing my luck, they’ll already be taken. And when that’s done, I still have the gift to organise. Go take your shower.”
“Rental properties? Why are you looking at those?” I ask.
“Because this arrangement was only supposed to be temporary. I don’t want Toby and Sasha to think I’m taking advantage of them.”
“They won’t think that,” I growl.
“Jake, please, I need to do this for me. I need the space for my business; to display my dresses so brides can come and view them. I–”
I cut her off by holding up my hand. “How about this? We talk to Toby and Sasha about you staying a little bit longer. We can talk to them about converting the other spare room downstairs into a display room. I know Sasha already did Toby’s old room up so you can make dresses in there.”
She looks at me and tears well within her eyes. “Jake, I…I don’t know what to say.”
“Say you’ll agree to us talking to Toby and Sasha about this later tonight. We’ll come up with a plan and solution because I’m not about to ask the mother of my child to move out when we are making so much progress together as a couple. I’m hoping that soon you and I will be at a place where I can move home.”
She nods. “Yes. We’ll talk to Toby and Sasha, but I want you to keep an open mind that they may say no.”
They won’t.
I wrap my arms around her, hugging her one last time. “Alright, I’m going to have a shower, then I’ll help you organise Aria’s gift.”
I walk away from her and throw her a grin as I close the bathroom door. She rolls her eyes, but I can see the temptation to join me crossing her face. I will not lose my family because of this living arrangement. I want Stephanie here, living with me. I need my family to stay together.
I want a future with her as more than just the mother of my child.
Stephanie
We arrive at Aria’s place for the baby shower, taking the family car that Jake had bought us. Toby and Sasha grab a ride with us, and I opted to be the designated driver for the trip home; they’ll all have a few drinks between them.
I park the car outside Aria’s place, shut off the engine, and we all get out. Jake gets our gift from the back of the car and then slides his hand in mine.
“So it’s official then? You two are a couple?” Toby asks, throwing Jake a grin.
“Sure are, got a problem with that?” Jake replies.
I look up at him with a huge smile, and he’s smiling back at me.
“I love you.” It’s barely a whisper, and I’m not sure Toby and Sasha would approve of my telling Jake this so soon.
“I know.” He presses his lips onto mine in a quick kiss.
We follow Toby and Sasha inside Aria and Simon’s place. So far, the only people here are family: Mel, Simon’s sister, and her partner Lara, James, Riley and Simon. Aria is sitting on the couch.
“Hey,” Toby calls.
Jake closes the door behind us, and we step down into the room. Aria hugs each of us in turn but stops when she gets to Jake and me.
“Are you two officially a couple?” she asks, eyeing up our linked hands.
I smile at her widely, and she hugs me excitedly. “See, I told you it would happen.”
“We went on a date last night.”
“Tell me everything,” she says. We sit down on the couch together, and Jake leans down.
“Do you want a drink?” he asks.
“Yes, can I have sparkling grape juice?” I ask.
He places a kiss to my forehead. “I’ll get it for you.”
I watch as he walks away and Aria turns towards me. “Start talking.”
“Well, he met my parents three weeks ago and then took me out on a proper date a week later. Thanks for your help by the way. Since then, things have just come naturally after spending time together when he’s home and not on base. I’m just letting things happen. We’ve both made mistakes and hurt one another, so we’re taking things slow.”
“But you’ve already slept together,” Aria says, giving me a sly look. My face flushes with heat, and I can’t hide my emotions. “Hon, I’m so happy for you both. You two deserve to be happy, and I always knew you’d make a great couple.”
“Now, I just need to get my business back on track, and things will be fabulous.”
“You will hon, I know it. You’re a fabulous designer.”
Riley and Sasha come over.
“Did you ever find out who was stealing your clients?” Riley asks.
“I did, and it’s my business rival, Darla.”
“Oh, you mean the lady from the show. I bet she can’t make a dress out of a paper bag,” Riley says, and I nod at her.
“I’m thinking of doing a sale on my current stock just to try and move it along.”
“Did I just hear sale on your dresses? Steph, you have some awesome designs, why put them on sale?” Sasha asks.
“Just to move the stock along so I have some space if that makes sense.”
“We should do it at my place,” Riley suggests. “Sasha, you’re getting married, so let’s use it as a chance for you to try on dresses and take photos, then you can either choose a dress of Steph’s that you like or you can get her to design one.”
“Yeah, that sounds like a great idea,” she says, then turns to me. “And we can discuss your baby shower at the same time.”
Jake comes back over with my drink and places it on the table for me. “I’ll be outside with the guys if you need me.”
“Okay, have fun.”
He places a kiss on my forehead, and I turn my attention back to the girls.
“Are we all free next weekend? The guys can be here setting up the rest of the furniture for the baby, and we can be having some fun at Riley’s place,” Aria suggests.
They all nod in agreement before looking at me. “I’ll get the muscle men to load the dresses into the car, and then we can go from there.”
“How many do you have to sell?” Riley asks.
“Twenty, but I know Sasha will want to look at them all, so I’ll bring a mixture.”
“Good idea. I’ll come by during the week, and we’ll load them up. Then, if you like, you can use the space at our place to store the dresses, and when they sell, we can work through them one at a time. We’ll get your business running again, Steph.”
I’m grateful for all their help. I’m hoping perhaps I can do a large enough sale that I can keep a few different dresses on hand just in case. Suddenly, I’m struck with an idea. I don’t want to rent a house from a landlord, but I rather prefer to own one of my own. I’m not sure I want to rent again what with what I’ve had to go through recently, and buying my own home would mean I can run my business out of there and there’s no stress with the possibility of a landlord kicking me out.
First, I need to talk with Toby and Sasha about my idea. I cast a glance outside the door and see Jake in conversation with Toby. I’m hoping he’s mentioning that I want to talk to them later.
“Sasha, do you think I could talk with you and Toby about the current living arrangement later?” I ask.
“Sure. Wait, are you moving out?” she asks with concern on her face.
“No, I’m not, but I’ll tell you later what my plan is.”
She smiles, appearing relieved. “Done.”
Jake smiles at me through the glass, and I smile back at him. Perhaps maybe over time, Jake and I could move in together and be a proper little family.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Stephanie
This week has been amazing. Not only did Sasha and Toby agree to let me stay until I have enough money to buy a house, but they are going to make the room opposite the one I currently sleep in into a nursery for when the baby arrives.
My idea to have a wedding dress sale was a hit, and so far, I’ve sold ten dresses and made a few new clients who need alterations too.
Jake has been a bit strange this week, and I’m not sure why. I’ve asked him about what colour to paint the baby’s room, and he just shrugs. During the week, he’s on base, so I don’t get to see him much. I wish I knew what was going on with him. He’s not attending my midwife appointment today, but he is coming home tonight, and I have something I really want to ask him.
I’m sitting at the dining room table, designing some new dresses for future ideas when my phone starts ringing on the table. Looking at it, I see an unknown number.
“Hello, Stephanie Morrison speaking,” I say, answering the call.
“Oh, thank goodness, you answered. Stephanie, it’s Aleisha, one of the brides you met at the show. As you know, I’m getting married in November, and I thought I’d made the right decision five months ago by leaving you to try this other bridal store, only to now find out she’s not even started on my dress design. She’s asking the same questions she asked me ages ago as if she doesn’t even have a record of what we spoke about. I’m ringing you to apologise. I shouldn’t have walked away from you. I really need your help with my dress. I know I’m cutting things close, and I’m just going to have to pick a dress off the rack, but can you help?” Her voice is a mixture of emotions but mostly desperation.
“Of course, I can help you. In fact, I’ve literally just finished making a gown that might be exactly what you are looking for. You’d given me an idea of what you wanted when we initially spoke, and I liked it, so I started designing it that night and made it anyway.”
“Really? Oh, you are a star! When can I come and view it?” she asks.
“How about this coming weekend? I’m free on Sunday. You’ll have to come to my home as I’m twenty-five weeks pregnant and not moving too far these days. Will this be a problem?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Awesome. I’ll email you the details along with a time for you to come and see the dresses. You’re welcome to look through my entire stock and try on as many as you like.”
“Oh, thank you again, so very much. I’ll be in touch.”
I hang up the phone and make a note to get the dresses back from Riley that I think Aleisha might like, and then a few others that have sparkles and bling on them too. They’re different styles as well, so she might find herself hard-pressed to pick one.
Smiling to myself, I’m feeling giddy and like I’m succeeding again.
Tonight, I’m asking Jake to come home and be with me. I want to fall asleep in his arms every night and wake up to his soft kisses in the morning. Suddenly, a text comes through from him.
Jake: Hey, how are you doing? Do you think you and I can talk tonight?
Me: Uh-oh sounds serious. Are you breaking up with me?
Jake: No, I’m not, but I do want to talk.
Me: Okay. Love you. Can’t wait to see you.
Jake: Me too.
This day just keeps getting better and better.
Jake
“Are you scared that Stephanie’s idea of buying a house is her way of saying she’s leaving you? Are you scared that it’s the whole Joe situation all over again? Are you afraid of everyone abandoning you, because from what you’ve described of Stephanie, it doesn’t sound like she’s leaving, but it definitely sounds like this is why you’re having these nightmares of her leaving? You’re scared her future plans don’t include you. I suggest you have a discussion with her about all of this. You might find yourself surprised.”
The counsellor’s words ring through my ears as they have done all week. I am worried her idea of buying a house doesn’t include me. I’m worried she’s going to get up and walk out, taking our daughter with her. I’ve been staying on base on and off for the last week. My nightmares are worse than ever, causing me to thrash around in bed. I don’t want to end up hurting Stephanie in the middle of the night. The nights I do stay here are calmer, and I do get more sleep. I’m just not sure where I fit into her plans.
Joe didn’t leave but was killed in action. However, the counsellor is right that my nightmares over Stephanie leaving do feel like abandonment. I feel like I abandoned Joe when he needed me most and that I could have tried harder to save him. I’m just glad she’s agreeable to talking with me.
I arrive at the house, park the car up the drive since neither Toby nor Sasha is home. I grab the flowers I bought her off the front seat, climb out of the car and grab my bag from the backseat. Then, I make my way to the door.
As I get inside, there’s no sign of Stephanie at all. I wonder where she is. I make my way up to the bedroom where I find her dressed in a silky robe, lighting some candles. I slide my arms around her, and she jumps.
“Jake, you scared me.”
“Sorry baby, I didn’t mean to. What is all this for?”
“I thought we could have a mini date then talk like you wanted.”
“Talk first beautiful, then sexy time.” I waggle my eyebrows at her.
Dumping my bag into the closet, I come back into the room and pop open the bottle of sparkling grape juice that Stephanie has chilling on the bedside table. Pouring us both a glass, I motion for us to sit down on the bed. She takes a drink and sits.
“So what did you want to talk about?” she asks.
“Well, I want to tell you that I’ve been seeing an on-base counsellor and that I’m still having nightmares. Mostly they’ve been about you leaving me, and lately, I’ve been worried about that. You’re making all these future plans, and I’m wondering where I fit into them.”
She looks at me, and I worry for a moment that she’s going to tell me I don’t fit at all.
“Babe, I’m so sorry. I should’ve made things clearer. I’m making these plans for us. I want us to have some stability and a home for our family, but I need a place where I can still work too.” I take a sip of my drink. I need to hear her tell me she wants me. “Actually, it’s what I wanted to ask you about tonight. I want you to come home; no more of this staying on base. I need you here every night. I want to cuddle into you and be there for you when you have a nightmare. I don’t want you doing it alone anymore.”
I look at her unbelieving of what she’s just said.
