New beginnings by the su.., p.17
New Beginnings by the Sunflower Cliffs, page 17
The next morning, Bea woke early and got up quietly hoping not to disturb Shani. After a while, she dialled Luke’s number. ‘Yes?’ croaked a deep female voice.
Bea panicked and slammed down the phone. Leilani. She was furious with herself for daring to believe Luke when he said they weren’t together. Bea pushed her jealously to the back of her mind. She paced her bedroom trying to work out the best way to contact him without having to hear Leilani’s self-satisfied voice, finally coming to the annoying conclusion that she would simply have to wait.
Bea was frustrated that she hadn’t arranged to see him. She knew she should keep her distance, especially when his girlfriend was right there in his bed. She pictured his toned body wrapped around Leilani’s perfect limbs and felt a sick feeling deep in her stomach. However hard she tried to remember what Tom had told her about Luke, she still couldn’t help her feelings. It didn’t help when he acted the way he had done at the ball. She needed him to know he couldn’t play with her emotions. He had a girlfriend, and it wasn’t fair on either of them to play games.
She didn’t want to wake Shani, so decided that maybe today was the perfect day to resume her attempt at jogging. Despite her best intentions, she hadn’t been since that day at the beach with Paul and Shani. A run on the beach would do her good, she decided, so she dragged on her tracksuit and tatty trainers. She pushed a few pounds into her pocket so that she could buy the newspapers on the way home, grabbed her phone and drove to Grouville bay.
Bea remembered to stretch her legs gently to warm up and took a few deep breaths of fresh air. ‘Ahh.’ This was more like it. She walked down the cobbled slipway and gazed appreciatively at the sea and the surfers as they rode the rolling waves on their colourful boards.
She decided to start slowly. ‘Phew,’ she grumbled, finding even a gentle jog tiring, ‘this is far harder than it looks when Paul and Shani do it.’ After about a hundred and fifty yards she was panting, and if it hadn’t been for the other runners pacing along the beach, she would have allowed herself to collapse in a heap face down onto the damp sand.
Bea forced herself on for as long as she could bear. She could hardly breathe. Her chest was tight and her calf muscles burning. There was nothing for it but to casually slow to a walk and then stop. Bea stood feet slightly apart, hands firmly on thighs, bent over, red in the face and gasping for air.
Having managed to slow her heart rate to near-normal, she turned to walk back up the slipway to the catering van, hoping to compensate her efforts with a Galaxy and a large coffee, when her phone rang. With shaking fingers, she pressed the green button as she paced along, eager to reach the liquid refreshment she had promised herself. ‘Hello?’ she panted.
‘Is everything all right?’ Luke whispered. ‘I saw I had a missed call?’
‘Argh,’ she screeched, tripping on a stone and landing in an ungainly heap, cracking her knee on the concrete path, grazing her hand and sending her phone flying with a loud clatter. ‘Shit, shit, bollocks,’ she grimaced, rubbing her knee and brushing away the tears of pain that seemed to come from nowhere. She grabbed her phone. ‘Luke, I—’
‘Stay where you are, I’m coming to get you,’ she heard Luke shout as she put the phone to her ear. ‘Where did you say you were?’
‘Just off the first slipway, Grouville beach,’ she breathed. ‘But I’m—’ the phone went dead. ‘Fine,’ she added. Bea held the phone in front of her and stared blankly at the screen. ‘Sod it.’
She pulled up her trouser leg and winced at the blackening bruise and beads of blood on her knee, then remembered Luke was coming. ‘Oh, hell.’ She covered her leg again and tucked loose blonde strands of hair behind her ears to try and look reasonably human. He was going to see her unwashed and sweaty, and after only having run a short distance. It then occurred to Bea that he didn’t have to know how little she’d run before nearly suffering a coronary. And anyway, what did that have to do with anything?
Yes, let him come, she decided. Let him think she did this thing every Sunday, like Bea was damn sure Leilani did. An annoying image of Leilani, her endless, toned legs in the tiniest micro shorts, pacing comfortably along the beach sprang uninvited into Bea’s mind.
Bea hobbled towards the van. ‘Morning, Des,’ she said, trying to sound cheerier than she felt now that she’d managed to regain some composure.
‘Bleedin’ ’ell, Bea, you bin runnin’?’ he teased, taking in her dishevelled appearance. ‘That’s not like you, my love.’
‘Yes, but keep it to yourself, won’t you?’
‘Want your usual?’
Bea nodded. ‘Yes, please.’ She tidied up her hair and smiled when he handed her a coffee, Galaxy bar and her newspaper. ‘It won’t do any harm people thinking I take regular exercise, will it?’
‘What people’s that then?’ he asked, scratching his head as Bea paid him.
She spotted Luke running towards her. ‘Bea, what happened?’ he demanded urgently.
She turned to Des, her eyes wide with embarrassment. ‘People like him.’ She motioned discreetly, doing her best to ignore her stinging knee.
He stifled a guffaw with little success. ‘See ya next week then, love.’ He winked.
Bea turned to Luke. ‘Morning.’
‘Morning? What happened?’ he panted, looking her up and down. He pushed a hand through his messy fringe. Bea was painfully aware his hair was still tousled from racing straight over from his bed.
She stared at him silently, intent on remaining as composed as possible. ‘Nothing, why?’
Luke’s concerned expression morphed into one of fury. He grabbed her by the elbow.
‘Hey,’ she glared at him, ‘my coffee.’
‘Sod your coffee, you said something had happened,’ he accused angrily.
Bea shook him off. ‘No, I didn’t. You presumed something was wrong. You cut me off before I could finish what I was saying.’ She turned and walked off.
He soon caught up with her. ‘Do you realise how infuriating you can be sometimes?’
‘Now you listen to me.’ Bea glared at him.
‘No, you listen. When I phoned you back, it sounded like something dreadful had happened. I thought you were hurt.’ He noticed her torn tracksuit. ‘There’s blood seeping from your knee.’
She glanced down at her leg. ‘I slipped when I answered your call. I was slightly out of breath, that’s all,’ she sniffed. ‘I’d been for a run.’
He thought for a moment, confusion spreading across his angry face. ‘You sounded like you could hardly breathe,’ he continued, frowning. ‘That must have been some run. Why didn’t you phone me back if there was nothing wrong? You knew I was coming to find you.’
She stopped, leaving him to stride ahead for a couple of paces. He retraced his steps. ‘Bea, you phoned me at some ungodly hour this morning, remember?’
‘Surely Leilani can’t be very impressed that you’ve come here to meet me?’
Luke shook his head. ‘I didn’t feel the need to tell her, if you must know. So now that I’m here, you may as well tell me what was so damn important it couldn’t wait?’
Bea shrugged. ‘I called but only because I wanted to arrange to see you, then when you cut me off so abruptly the best thing seemed to just let you come here.’
His hands fell by his sides ‘You wanted to see me? Why?’
‘To discuss this thing.’ Bea was beginning to feel a little awkward. This wasn’t going to plan. He was supposed to have — what? She wasn’t quite sure.
‘Thing?’ he mocked. ‘Are you still drunk from last night?’ Bea stared at him in silence, trying to figure out what to say next. ‘Well, go on then. I’m waiting.’
‘Luke, your behaviour last night was ridiculous.’
‘How?’
‘Coming over to our table, insinuating things by staring at me, and then again when we were dancing.’
He looked down at her. ‘You’re lecturing me?’
‘I’m just saying!’
He ignored her protests. ‘Do you realise how badly you’re behaving?’ He stared at her, his eyes searching hers for answers. ‘I thought there could be something between us, but it seems I was wrong. Fair enough. But I’ve caught you looking at me as if you’re searching my face for an answer to something, and I’ve no idea what it is.’
Bea couldn’t look him in the eye. He was right, only she couldn’t tell him the truth.
‘Fine. I’ll leave you to carry on with your jogging, then.’ He marched off towards his car. ‘Bloody woman,’ she heard him curse.
Bea watched him leave, wishing she could afford not to care about his past. If only Simon didn’t want half of her house, if only she didn’t need to keep her job to be in with a chance to get that sodding mortgage. She walked towards her car, pulling her keys from her pocket as she balanced the coffee and paper in one hand. If only bloody Tom hadn’t told her about the investigation.
She dropped her bar of chocolate, hearing it break in its wrapper.
17
FEBRUARY – PRUNING DEADWOOD
Bea didn’t have to look at the calendar to know it would have been Annabel’s birthday today. She stood outside her kitchen door, holding the neck of her coat closed as she drank her coffee and stared across the garden. ‘I miss you,’ she whispered, glad to be alone with her memories. Bea wished she could go back one year to the birthday treat she’d surprised Annabel with. ‘It isn’t every day you’re seventy,’ Bea recalled saying when Annabel had expressed horror at how much her gift must have cost. ‘It’s from me and Simon. He arranged everything – the mystery walk with the Kew guide and tickets for Les Misérables. We have him to thank for this, really.’
Was it only me who was shocked at Simon’s double life? she wondered. She shook her head and held tightly on to her mug. No, Aunt Annabel had always been fond of him, too. Bea tried not to think how devastated her aunt had been when she’d discovered him with Claire. She hated to think that Annabel’s heart attack could’ve been brought on by that devastating night. She breathed in the crisp, frosty air and swallowed the lump restricting her throat. She’d shed enough tears for Simon, and her aunt would hate for her to spend today crying. No, she’d begin her day by visiting Aunt Annabel’s grave and take her some of her favourite orange roses.
‘I know they’re shop-bought,’ Bea murmured, aware that there were one or two others near the immaculate grave, ‘so I’ve brought you hyacinths, too. There’s one in blue and one in pink.’ Bea smiled. ‘You never could decide which colour you preferred.’ She breathed in the familiar scent, remembering many winters watching her aunt planting the bulbs and then watching them flower on the kitchen windowsill. It was a tradition she was determined to continue.
She picked up the vase and, noticing there wasn’t any water, sat back on her heels to get up and fetch some.
‘Here, let me.’
Startled by Luke’s voice, she stood up quickly, nearly dropping the vase in her hand. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘Sorry if I’m intruding, but I saw your car as I was driving past and realised it must be an anniversary of some sort. Your mum, or your aunt maybe?’
Bea cleared her throat. ‘It would have been Aunt Annabel’s seventy-first birthday today.’
‘I presume you planted the hyacinths especially for today, then?’
Bea nodded. She could feel herself welling up and turned away from him. ‘I was just…’
‘Let me.’ He took the empty vase from her hand and walked away.
Bea watched him and struggled to retain her composure. She didn’t want anyone to be too kind to her today. It would be too much to bear. She crouched back down and placed the hyacinths either side of the wooden cross, pushing their enamel containers slightly into the ground so the wind couldn’t disturb them.
‘Here you go,’ Luke said, handing her the vase, their hands grazing lightly.
‘Thank you,’ she said, placing the roses into the water. She rested a hand on the cross. ‘I can’t wait for this ground to settle so I can order a proper gravestone. I gather you have to wait about a year, though.’
‘Yes, something like that.’ He placed a hand lightly on Bea’s shoulder. ‘I hope you didn’t mind me stopping. I’ll leave you in peace now.’
Bea put her hand up until she could hold his fingers. The warmth of his touch on her shoulder was strangely comforting. ‘I don’t mind. Thank you for looking out for me, it was kind.’
As his footsteps receded along the narrow path, she could almost hear her aunt’s approval. Aunt Annabel liked strong men. Her Antonio had been a well-built man, always needing a formidable team of polo ponies to take his bulk. She’d like the idea of Luke working with his hands. She never did understand people’s preference for working in offices. Bea’s breath caught in her throat as emotion got the better of her, and she cried for a few minutes. ‘I’m so lost right now,’ she whispered, placing her hand on the cold wood of the cross. ‘Surely things will improve soon.’
Bea arrived at her father and stepmother’s home a short while later. As usual, it hadn’t occurred to either of them that today might be a day when Bea wouldn’t want to discuss wedding plans. But it was easier for her to get it over with than to row about it endlessly, so she fixed a smile on her face and went in.
‘I’ve invited Tom,’ Bea heard Mel say as she let herself into the house. ‘He doesn’t have a partner either, so I thought Bea— Oh, there you are.’ She seemed confused by Bea’s unhappy expression. ‘I was saying, you’re pairing up with Tom.’
‘I’d really rather not, Mel.’ She had no intention of staying any longer than necessary.
‘Now, now, girls,’ her dad said, standing up to give her a bear hug. ‘No fighting. Mel’s right, though.’
‘It’s not a problem, but why should it matter if I take someone or not?’
‘Because then I can deduct your “plus ones” from the invitees.’ Mel took her crystal-covered biro and scrawled out the writing next to Bea’s name and then Tom’s on her printed out spreadsheet.
Bea scowled at her sister. What was she on about? She looked at her dad for a clue.
‘Mel and Joyce have got a little enthusiastic with their invitations, and Grant has finally put his foot down.’
‘Not Grant,’ Mel groaned. ‘Dad’s the one being selfish.’ She pulled a sulky face at him. Bea could remember when that princess-look of hers used to work, around the age of five. She tried not to be irritated with her sister.
‘Thank you, Melanie,’ Joyce snapped, entering the living room carrying a plate of biscuits. ‘I think your father is being perfectly reasonable about this.’ She looked Bea up and down. ‘I thought we said ten-thirty, not eleven o’clock,’ she said, looking pointedly at her watch. ‘I have a list of items to work through today, Beatrice. We can’t all be spending time wallowing.’
Bea ignored her and sat down, soothed by her father’s glare in Joyce’s direction as he left the room. She knew he’d have a go at Joyce when she’d left, but a part of her wished he’d do it in front of her for once.
‘Melanie tells us she’s inviting Luke and his glamorous girlfriend. You and Tom will have to team up, and no argument.’ She hesitated for a moment. ‘I do believe though that refusing to allow any more than one hundred people in the marquee is probably a little too conservative, Eric,’ she shouted in the general direction of his study. ‘Your precious lawn will always grow back if we do decide to hire a larger marquee.’
‘I think a hundred guests are more than enough,’ Bea said, happy to support her father. ‘You can’t have that many friends, and neither side have large families, do they?’
‘Beatrice, I’ll thank you to keep your opinions to yourself,’ Joyce snapped, raising her chin in her usual aggressive manner when anyone dared to disagree with her. Bea remembered being terrified of Joyce when she was little, until she saw Annabel stand up to her and give her hell. Bea smiled to herself. That was the night when Annabel told Joyce and her father that Bea would be moving in with her for good. It had been the happiest day of her life, until her wedding day.
‘Are you listening to me?’
Bea blinked and tried to recall what Joyce had been saying. ‘Of course.’
‘You’ve had your big day and I won’t allow you to ruin your sister’s, whatever misguided loyalties you might have about that date.’
Bea concentrated on not giving in to her temper. She glared at Mel. ‘I’m sorry if I think choosing Aunt Annabel’s first anniversary is a bit insensitive.’
‘You’re so selfish.’ Joyce pursed her thin lips together. ‘You’ve always thought more about that old woman than you did anyone else.’
‘You wonder why?’ Bea murmured under her breath.
Her father returned to the room. ‘What’s all this commotion?’ He looked over at Joyce, who for once kept quiet. ‘I told you that I wanted this to be a calm chat, so let’s keep it that way. Mel’s day should be as perfect at yours was, Bea,’ he said, ignoring Joyce’s badly concealed moan. ‘I agree the date is unfortunate, but it’s booked now. Maybe it’s not such a bad thing to have something happy for us all to focus on.’
‘Maybe,’ Bea said, unconvinced. She was the only one who’d had any affection for Aunt Annabel. She suspected her father had a soft spot for her too, being his first wife’s sister, but never dared show it, probably because Joyce always seemed so sensitive about any reminder that she wasn’t the first woman he had loved. Not wishing to give her father more grief than he suffered most days, Bea nodded.
‘Mel tells me she’s come up with a way for you to keep Simon away from the house?’ her father added.
