He licks his lips again, his hooded gaze locked on my movements, and the slow and lazy pumps of his cock hasten, bordering on the edge of desperate.

  Same as my need for him.

  But for sanity’s sake, this is a battle of wills I need to win, because he’s going to take me tonight by inching his impressive length into my ass, all the while making me beg for more. I don’t know how I know it, but I do. It’ll be painful and empowering—an experience I’ll never forget.

  An experience that will bond us for life.

  With my heart pounding an erratic beat, I finish rinsing the soap from my skin before stepping past him to exit the shower. “We don’t want to be late for dinner,” I say, much too innocent as I grab a towel from a knob on the wall outside the stall.

  “Well played,” he mutters.

  From the corner of my eye, I spy him switching the water temperature to cold. I hide a smile as I make my way into the bedroom, water dripping onto the carpet with the imprints of my triumphant footfalls.

  Chapter Five

  The Vertigo sits atop an antique shop. It’s an apt name for a restaurant, considering how I’m still reeling from the last few hours, my world spinning around me as if I’m suffering from a horrible case of the medical condition by the same name.

  Instead of sharing a meal with a block of wood between us, we’re seated side-by-side. Water lilies float in decorative bowls on the table, surrounded by votive candles. The rooftop restaurant has an intimate feel, with futon-like seating where couples can cuddle while they wait for dinner. Drapes enclose the dining booths on three sides, offering privacy while leaving the view of the sea unobstructed. It’s cozy and romantic, even in the light of day. I can only imagine how the dawning of night would enhance the experience.

  Then again, I’m far from complaining as Sebastian kisses the wine off of my lips.

  “I might get drunk from the taste of you,” he says against my mouth.

  “It’s not me. It’s the wine.”

  He tugs on my lower lip with his teeth. “It’s definitely you.”

  Someone clears their throat, and when we part, I find our waitress holding a tray on the other side of the table. She keeps her head dipped, demeanor professional for discretion’s sake, but I don’t miss the amused smile hinting at her lips. We decided on a shrimp and steak feast for two, and she sets down the last dish before asking if we require anything else.

  “Another bottle of wine, please.” I eye my empty glass on the table. I’m a little tipsy and probably don’t need more, but the wine is loosening me up, making me relaxed and submissive under Sebastian’s hands and mouth.

  And I’m more than a willing participant.

  The waitress returns a few minutes later with the requested bottle before leaving us in peace.

  Sebastian refills both of our glasses. “Are you on a mission to intoxication?”

  “Maybe a little.”

  “Maybe a lot.” He hands me my glass then takes a sip of his own, eyes studying me from above the rim. “Are you that nervous about tonight?”

  I hold his gaze and decide to go with the truth. “Yes.”

  “What are you nervous about?” He sets his glass on the table and palms my cheek.

  Until this day—running away with him and spending time outside the circular walls of the estate—I would have never guessed Sebastian could be so romantic. This day has been like a dream, a page out of a young girl’s book of fairytales.

  And yet real life has a way of inserting itself between us.

  “I’m nervous about everything, nervous of being awkward, scared that it’ll hurt.” I swallow hard. “Scared things will change once we go back.”

  “Change can be a good thing.”

  “I don’t want to lose this with you.” Drawing in a shaky breath, I cover his hand on my cheek. “You’ve shown me there’s a different side of you.”

  “I’ve shown you the worst of me too, princess. I’m not proud of it.” Letting his hand drop, he frowns. “Being a prisoner inside that place fucks with my head.”

  “Why do you feel like a prisoner?”

  He drags a hand through his hair, leaving it in a disheveled state of sexiness. “I don’t want to ruin this.” He gestures at the cozy scenery. “We have all month to get into the heavy shit.”

  I shelve my curiosity for now, because he’s right. Why ruin a perfect day by talking about things that will only bring us down? As he cuts into his steak, I’m drawn to the view of his brawny forearms. He chose a casual dress shirt, cuffs rolled up, to go with the dark pair of hole-free jeans encasing his powerful thighs.

  He looks good enough to eat, better than the delectable aroma of our dinner wafting from the table. After we’ve put a dent in the food on our plates, I finally give voice to a question I’ve had for months.

  “At least answer me this,” I say, spearing a butter sautéed shrimp with a fork. “What does SAS stand for?”

  He stalls, his fork halfway to his mouth. “My initials?”

  “Yeah.”

  “My middle name is Alexander.”

  “Oh.” Before I can hide it, a smile hints at my lips. I shove the shrimp into my mouth, but he sees my amusement anyway.

  “What did you think it stood for?” There’s a twinkle in his eye, as if he knows this is something I don’t want to admit.

  And he’s right.

  His attention doesn’t waver, patience winning out until I cave. He’s an expert at whittling away at the cracks in my foundation, working them over until they widen enough for me to slip into the vacuum of Sebastian Whatever-the-A-stands for Stone.

  “I gave you a private nickname.” My cheeks warm under his scrutiny.

  With a grin, he leans back. “You know I’m not budging until you tell me what it is.”

  “You can’t make me tell you.”

  “Bet I can.” Leaning into my shoulder, he shoves a hand between my thighs, and his sinful thumb caresses my slit through my panties. “If you don’t fess up, I’ll make you beg to come right here.”

  My gaze darts left and right in a panic, but I know better than to push his hand away when he’s got that look about him, his expression hardened resolve that dares me to challenge him. If we were alone—without waitstaff bustling by—I’d be up for such a challenge.

  “Sexy As Sin…that’s what I call you.”

  “You think I’m sexy?” Instead of withdrawing his touch, he finds my bundle of aching nerves and gently flicks me there.

  “Maybe I should have nicknamed you Sadistic and Smug.”

  “You didn’t answer the question,” he says, increasing the rhythm of his bold caress.

  “You’re still touching me.”

  “I didn’t say I’d stop. I said I’d make you beg for it. You can’t beg if your mouth is busy.” He presses his lips to mine, and we stumble into a free-fall of a kiss, mouths parting, tongues battling, hearts yearning.

  I grab hold of his shirt and moan. “Sexy as sin,” I breathe as we part.

  He rests his forehead against mine. “I’m ready to get sexy and sinful with you. I don’t think I can hold off anymore.” Several seconds pass, and then he takes a deep breath, pulls away, and calls for the check.

  Chapter Six

  The drive back to the cottage is quick, and so is my stunned reaction when we step inside. Coming to a halt two feet from the entrance, I gape at the sight before me. Candles cover every surface, from the living room to the kitchen, the flames a brightening flicker in the shadows as the sun yearns for the horizon.

  “When did you do this?”

  “I had it done during dinner.” Without uttering another word, he takes my hand and leads me into the bedroom where even more candles blaze, accompanied by vases of plumeria.

  “I can’t believe you did this.” There’s no doubt or accusation in my tone—only pure awe. “I didn’t expect it.”

  “You deserve it.” The candlelight plays on his features as he moves closer. “You deserve so much more than what the twelve of us have given you.”

  “Why does anyone deserve anything?” Something tells me he’s seen several harsh realities of his own, and though I want to know every last detail about him, I file it away for later.

  “If anyone deserves to be adored, it’s you, Novalee. Your soul is pure. You don’t resort to guile or deceit. You feel with your heart, but you think with it too.” His eyes lock onto mine, and he lets a beat pass. “You deserve a real wedding night, but this is the closest to one I can give you.”

  I blink. “What do you mean?”

  He shakes his head, expression cast in regret. “Enough of the heavy shit tonight, remember?”

  Instead of giving him a verbal answer, I reach for the buttons on his shirt and unfasten them, taking my time as my fingers trace the warm skin underneath. He lets the shirt fall off his shoulders before slipping a finger under the spaghetti strap of my dress.

  His focus stalls on my breasts. “You wear a lot of blue. Is it your favorite color?”

  Tugging my lower lip between my teeth, I watch as he slides the strap down my shoulder. “It’s been a subconscious choice…more recently.” Without elaborating, I meet his brilliant aqua eyes.

  He lowers the other strap, and the light sundress accompanies his shirt on the floor. His famous smirk is absent, his expression cast in seriousness as if I’m his entire world. That look takes my breath away.

  “Sebastian,” I breathe, setting my palms on his warm, muscular chest.

  “Your hands feel good on me, princess.”

  I trail my fingers down the ripple of his abs, bringing about a shudder, and I’m in awe that I have the power to pull such a reaction from him. Before I reach the waistband of his jeans, he grabs my hands, and his lips seek mine. I sigh as our mouths merge.

  For the longest time, he just kisses me, gripping my hands against his abdomen as the bedroom seems to spin around us. I don’t notice him inching me toward the bed until the backs of my knees press into the mattress.

  Breaking the kiss, he takes my face between his hands. “Do you want me?”

  It’s not the first time he’s asked me that, but unlike two months ago, when I was in the House of Gemini and he uttered those words, now there’s no doubt of the uncertainty that plagues his tone. The fact that I have the power to hurt him makes me surrender completely, because underneath that tough lion exterior lies a man that just wants to be loved.

  I don’t know how I didn’t see it before.

  “I want you,” I say, voice choked with too much emotion.

  Holding me by the nape, he buries his face in the crook of my shoulder, his breaths hitting my skin in rapid shudders. “I want inside you.”

  “Okay,” I choke out my consent, struggling to work past the fear.

  “Don’t be scared.” He tangles a hand in my hair. “I’ll take it slow. I promise.”

  Veering back, I hold his gaze as I reach behind me and unclasp my bra. After the garment drops to the floor, I reach for the button of his jeans.

  He’s not wearing underwear, and when I tug down the zipper, his erection springs free of the denim. He shoves the pants down his legs and kicks them free, then he’s pushing me into the mattress, his warm and naked body crawling over me. Reaching between our bodies, he slides his fingers through my arousal and presses a digit forward, stopping at the barrier of resistance.

  “Damn, you’re wet,” he groans.

  “I’m frustrated.”

  His mouth tilts into a smile. “That’s definitely a problem I can fix.”

  Cradling my face in one hand, our eyes connect, unwavering as he strokes me between the legs. It doesn’t take long to launch me to a whole other level of desperate need. Body straining into his touch, I writhe underneath him, skin glistening in sweat and pheromones.

  “Please,” I gasp.

  He sucks in a breath. “Open your eyes. Let me see you come.”

  They shoot open. I hadn’t realized I’d closed them. “More…please.”

  “God, you’re gorgeous.” He increases the pressure on my clit. “Give it all to me, princess.”

  Orgasm takes me captive, and I moan as his mouth slants over mine, eating up the keening cries he wrenched from my core. We’re chest to chest, heart to heart, two souls lost in a labyrinth of desire, clinging to each other as if we share the same body.

  He pulls out of our kiss. “Don’t move,” he murmurs before crawling to the edge of the bed.

  I couldn’t lift a limb if I tried. Compared to the rush of blood during climax, my blood runs sluggish in my veins, muscles weak and trembly from the release. As I stare at the ceiling, I detect the sound of a drawer above the frantic beat of my heart. The mattress moves under his weight again, and his knees settle between my thighs.

  Two strong hands grab my hips. “Lift up.”

  I dig my heels against the mattress, allowing him to wedge a firm pillow under my ass. He hesitates, his lust-filled stare dark with need. “It’ll hurt a little, especially the first time.”

  That’s no surprise, considering his size. “I trust you.”

  He picks up a bottle from the bed and flips the cap open. It’s the same stuff Vance used before he inserted the anal plug, and I anticipate the cold sensation as Sebastian applies it. He squirts more into his palm before fisting his cock.

  I’m a nervous wreck as he settles between my legs, and I expect him to begin the slow and painful journey to becoming one through the only part of my body he’s allowed to take. Instead, he glides the plump head of his cock up and down my slit. Hips taking on a lazy, circular motion, he uses his erection to spark my arousal to life all over again.

  He grips my knees and spreads me wider, bringing our groins closer together as he increases the pace, and then, with his arctic gaze trapping me in the path of his stare, he shifts to my ass and teases the opening there.

  Pressure, followed by burning resistance, and then I feel myself stretching to accept his tip. Gasping in pain, I fist the bed sheets and bear down. It’s instinctive, my body’s way of protecting me, despite what my heart and mind tell me to do.

  “I can’t…it hurts.”

  “It will at first.” He presses a hand on my belly, his thumb reaching for my clit. “Give it a few minutes. Your body will loosen up.”

  “How?” My voice tears through the darkening room, two octaves higher with panic. “You’re so big.”

  “Don’t fight it, princess. You were made for me.”

  The gravelly quality of his voice, along with the possessiveness of his tone, smashes through the last of my fear, and my bones turn to liquid. He gains another inch before coming to a halt.

  “I’m barely inside you, but God, do you feel amazing.”

  Sweet tension coils around my thighs, tingles at the bottoms of my feet. I’m nauseous and too hot and aroused all at once, antsy under his ministrations—going mad with impatience at his inaction, despite knowing he’s holding back for my own good.

  To give my body time to stretch.

  To grow used to the fullness of him in an exit-only space that’s too snug, no matter how slick his cock is—no matter the amount of preparation.

  “Please,” I groan. “Don’t draw it out.”

  “I’m not going to hurt you, baby. Close your eyes and breathe.”

  “I don’t want to.” Nothing can tear me away from the force of his blue eyes, or the beauty of his face as he enters my body for the first time. It’s a painful but exhilarating experience, and I don’t want to miss a moment. “I need to look at you.”

  Holding me by the hips, he pushes in another inch, and I can’t stop from grimacing. A bite of my lip holds back a whimper. He sinks in even further, and then he lowers himself against me, chest to chest, his nose lingering inches from mine.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yes.”

  He pulls out and pushes back in, this time deeper. “Tell me if it hurts too much. The pain should be easier to handle, not worse.”

  “It feels—” The word good isn’t sufficient, but my first pain-free cry is a raucous symphony of pleasure.

  He cradles my cheek for the next thrust before entwining our hands, his fingers tight around mine as he moves inside me. I’ve never felt so adored, so wanted, so close to another person.

  As the final sunbeams of the day disappear, the room dims, cocooning us in shadows of intimacy. Candlelight dances across his broad shoulders, and dark blond hair flops over his forehead as we move together in sweat and need, pain becoming pleasure.

  Uncertainty and lack of experience becoming courage.

  I tighten my grip on his hands and arch into his rhythm, climbing to a place I didn’t know existed—a place that transcends every erotic moment I’ve treasured until now.

  “You okay?” he asks with a grunt, checking on me still, despite the continuous moans and needy whimpers escaping my mouth.

  “Uh-huh…don’t stop.”

  “Wouldn’t dare.” Closing his eyes, he drops his forehead against mine, lips spread thin over gritted teeth. “Your body is heaven.”

  If my body is heaven, then his is a sexy and sinful hell that tempts the innocent girl right out of me.

  Without warning, he pulls out and sits on his haunches, hauling me onto his lap before I can utter a confused objection.

  “Wrap your legs around me.” Gripping my ass, he shifts into position and guides me onto his cock again. I groan at the renewed anal intrusion, writhing in the space between pain and pleasure as he traps me in the cage of his embrace.

  “You feel so deep,” I say, heels digging into the mattress.

  “I am deep, deeper than I thought I’d ever be with you.”

  There’s a double meaning somewhere in those words, but I’m too worked up to analyze them. Instinct takes over, and I arch my spine, planting a hand on the mattress behind me for balance, and rock into him.

  “Jesus, you’re a natural,” he murmurs, lips warm against the swell of my breasts. “Keep moving like that. You’re driving me fucking wild.”

 

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