“A doctor’s appointment? Are you okay?”

  My palms get clammy, and I twist my neck, trying to loosen the pressure that built in the last two seconds. “Yes, of course. It’s just a checkup. Are you okay with a last-minute decision, or would you rather wait for another night?”

  There’s this sheet of guilt that covers me every time I slip about a doctor’s appointment. This person I’ve become where I have to bend the truth isn’t someone I thought I’d ever be. It really is just a checkup though…and blood work and a urinalysis and a physical. Blah blah blah. Rinse and repeat. It never seems to end. But technically, it is a checkup.

  “We can decide on Friday. I’ll just be hanging out at home.”

  “That sounds perfect. I just pulled up to Isaac’s, so I’ll let you go.”

  “Okay, but if you need to talk, you know I’m here.”

  “I know. Thanks, Ella.”

  Before I can even press the End button on my cellphone, Ella disconnects the call. Sometimes it amazes me how much everyone just accepts my quirks. No one has ever asked me why I don’t say goodbye, and they just respect it. There’s power in goodbyes. I used to say it all the time, just like everyone else. But it was the last word I said to my mother, and it was so final and heartbreaking. I’ll never say it to someone I love again.

  I don’t know how the week went by so fast. Why does time go so slow when you’re excited about something and so fast when you’re dreading something? I rub the Band-Aid over the ditch of my elbow where my blood was drawn as I make my way to the receptionist’s desk to schedule my next appointment. One of the downfalls of living in a small town is the distance you have to travel if you need special medical care. It’s not so much the hour-and-a-half drive, but the fact that I even have to do any of this to begin with that just makes me so damn angry.

  Dax, the office manager, smiles at me as I walk up to the counter. He’s always a friendly face to see since I can’t bring anyone with me to these appointments. I hated the doctor when I wasn’t chronically ill. Now every damn appointment is scary. But ever since he ran into me at the coffee shop next door to the doctor’s office, we’ve had a bit of a friendlier vibe between us. I was freaking out and trying to drown my sorrows in a cup of butterscotch cappuccino, and he saw my distant stare and offered to sit with me while he was on his lunch break. He made me feel so seen when I couldn’t take off my mask with anyone else.

  “All right, Stephanie. Let’s get you set up here so you can get yourself home to rest.” My nose starts to tingle, and I’m not sure what the hell is happening. I. Don’t. Cry. It’s the middle of the day—I don’t want to go home and rest. I know he’s trying to be sweet and caring, but it only solidifies why I don’t want people to know. Because they’d all be trying to get me to rest every second of the day.

  “Woah,” Dax says, spotting my watery eyes. He snatches a tissue from the box next to him and passes it over the counter. “You okay?”

  “Of course,” I say, waving my hand nonchalantly as I take the tissue with the other and quickly wipe my eye. “I think I just need to sneeze or something. Don’t worry about me.”

  “I do have a question on your updated paperwork. You didn’t fill out any emergency contact information. Do you have a number I can put down here?” He steadies his hand over the box on my paperwork that I purposely left blank.

  “No,” I blurt out, feeling all of my emotions hitting in my chest. During our little hang-out session at the coffee shop, I managed to tell Dax that I can’t share my diagnosis with anyone in my family. “I told you, no one knows about this, and they’re not going to.” I put my hand over my mouth as I swear I hear a camera shutter from a cell phone and glance behind me to see three people in the waiting room. A man with a ball cap has his face angled down into a magazine, a woman playing on her phone, and another woman dressed in a business suit looking out the window. It must have been the woman’s game, or I’m just having a full-on moment. I don’t think any of them heard my outburst.

  Poor Dax looks shocked. “I’m sorry, Stephanie.” He waves his hand in the air and sets the clipboard with my paperwork on it to the side. “That’s no problem. I just needed to ask since we’re re-entering all of our paperwork into the new system. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  He shuffles some papers on the desk, gives me a smile, and hands me a card with my next appointment written on it because he knows by now I always just tell him to schedule me in.

  “I’m sorry, Dax. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that.”

  His curved features soften. “Don’t even worry about it. Just let me know if you have any issues with that appointment. And if you need anything in the meantime, you know you can always call.”

  His friendly smile returns, and he flashes me a wink, but I feel embarrassed, so I get the hell out of there as fast as I can and head straight to work.

  By the time I get to work and sit down at my desk, it’s already past noon. Jaxon walks in from lunch with Eckerd, and I flash them a quick smile, then bury my head into my computer. Eckerd gives me a head nod before heading through the shop door, and Jaxon sits at his desk next to me.

  “Everything all right?” he asks.

  “Why wouldn’t it be?”

  “Good grief, you’re touchy today. I was just making sure your appointment went all right.”

  I told Jaxon I had a doctor’s appointment but made it sound like it was for a gynecologist appointment so he wouldn’t ask about it.

  “Everything is fine, Jaxon.”

  He leans his elbows onto his desk and yawns. “Good, because I don’t know if there’s anything more I can take right now. Holly is sick as a dog still, and I’m barely sleeping.”

  “Oh no, she still hasn’t stopped with the morning sickness?”

  Jaxon shakes his head. “Or afternoon sickness or night sickness. The doctor said she’s healthy and that it should ease up soon, but if it doesn’t, then he’ll prescribe her something. I want nothing more than to make her feel better, but what happens with those drugs and the baby? Are there side effects? Could she have a bad reaction to them? What if they don’t work at all and she continues to get sick?”

  I put my hand on Jaxon’s shoulder because I can see the spiral beginning. “She’s going to be just fine. Lots of women have the same issue, and it usually eases the further along she gets.”

  He pats my hand and nods. “Poor Kalina. She made Holly a brand-new batch of her favorite soap, and Holly took one smell of it and threw up.”

  “Oh no. Not the margarita one,” I say, trying to cover my giggle, but Jaxon smiles too.

  “Yep. They were laughing so hard because one tiny sniff was all it took. I’m just happy Holly’s got a sense of humor about it because I’ve been a wreck.”

  “Remember I couldn’t eat any red meat when I was pregnant with Levi? The sight of it alone would send me straight to a trash can.”

  Jaxon’s eyes light up as we both laugh at the memory. “I can’t believe I forgot about that. I came in with a cheeseburger from AV Tap, and you knocked it out of my hands as you yakked all over the floor.”

  Our laughter gets interrupted by Eckerd as he peeks his head through the shop door. “Hey, boss. Can you come check this real quick?”

  Jaxon nods, and Eckerd disappears back into the shop.

  “He didn’t tell you he asked me if I wanted to get a beer or something to eat last night, did he?”

  Jaxon’s face turns to stone. “Excuse me?”

  “I didn’t think so. I’m sure it was just innocent. Like asking a buddy out for a beer.”

  “Nope. You’re not a buddy,” he says, standing straight up from his chair. “You’re his boss, and that’s out of line.”

  I grab Jaxon’s hand to stop him and drop it when he freezes behind me. “You and I both know that you aren’t bothered by it because I’m his boss. I want to tell you things, Jaxon, but you can’t just fly off the handle every time. I took care of it, but I promise I’ll let you know if he asks me again. So let it go.”

  “Fine.”

  Jaxon slows his pace to the shop door but pauses as the town florist, Freida, walks into the office with a bouquet of red roses.

  “Oh my gosh, what do you have there?” I ask, rising from my desk as she places them on the raised customer counter.

  “They’re for you, dear.”

  Jaxon looks at the flowers, then to me, then back to the flowers again. “Who are they from?” His strong voice booms off the walls of the office.

  “I’m not sure. It came in as an online order. Someone must be trying to impress you, Ms. Stephanie. Y’all have a good day.”

  I scan the card that just has my name and shout to Freida just as she opens the door. “It doesn’t say who they’re from.”

  “Nope. No name. I even double-checked. I’ve got to run though. I still have a bunch of deliveries before the end of the day.”

  Freida gives a quick wave and rushes out the door. Jaxon glances to the shop door, then back to me. “You don’t think…” He stops midsentence and nods toward the shop.

  “No. No way would Eckerd have sent flowers. It wasn’t even that big of a deal. He asked me, I said no, and he casually said okay and we left. They’re probably from a happy customer.”

  Jaxon eyes me suspiciously before turning and walking into the shop.

  The flowers distract me for the rest of the day. I’ve only had a few dates in the past two months and I don’t give out where I work to just anyone.

  I see Ella walking from her driveway across the street in her sweatpants and open my front door before she even hits my lawn. She has a bottle of wine in one hand and a bag of something in the other. The timer goes off on the oven in the kitchen, and Ella jogs up the steps, then passes me into the house.

  “I brought chocolate. You should have seen me at the gas station today. Chocolate, wine, and a giant bag of chicken nuggets. As Sylvie was ringing me up, she just snickered. She knew I was on my period for sure.”

  I laugh and head to the kitchen to take the frozen pizza out of the oven as Ella follows me and rips open the bag of chocolates.

  “I heard you got flowers delivered today,” she says, wagging her eyebrows as I cut the pizza up.

  “Traveled that fast, did it? I shouldn’t be surprised. Jaxon is going to go nuts until he knows who sent them.”

  “So you really don’t know? I thought maybe you just weren’t telling him.”

  “I have no clue.”

  Ella follows me into the living room with the wine tucked into her arm as she carries her plate and the bag of chocolate. We plop down on the couch, and I set the wineglasses on the coffee table.

  “Maybe it was that guy you kicked in the nuts,” Ella says, filling up the glasses with white wine.

  “I highly doubt that. Cole threatened his life if he ever got in touch with me again,” I say, shoving the pizza in my mouth.

  Ella takes a bite of her pizza while cradling her glass of wine in one hand as her eyes work around the room. “Where are they anyway?”

  “I left them at the office. The only reasonable explanation I can think of is maybe a client sent them. We just completed a few big projects, and I know the electrical company was very happy with their fleet of trucks Jaxon and Eckerd wrapped.”

  Ella face lights up again. “Maybe it was Eckerd!”

  “Definitely not. He would know better than to send flowers to me right in front of Jaxon.”

  A bored look takes over Ella’s face. “Well, that’s less fun.” Ella gives a quick eye roll before finishing up her slice of pizza and breaking into the chocolate. “You want a piece of chocolate?”

  “Duh.” I reach my hand over, and Ella gives me a few pieces.

  “Have I told you lately how much I love living across the street from you and having our chocolate and pajama dates?”

  I giggle and laugh. “I love it too.”

  “Have you heard the latest? The guys are trying to find Cole a date for Jaxon and Holly’s wedding,” Ella says, still chuckling.

  My face falls, along with the beating organ in my chest. “What? Is he okay with this?”

  Ella’s eyes slightly narrow as her head tilts. “I don’t think he even knows yet. It doesn’t bother you, does it?”

  “Yes, it bothers me.” I take a sip of wine. “They should stop pushing him. He can make his own decisions.” I roll my eyes and down the rest of the alcohol in my glass. When I right my head, Ella is looking at me with a smirk on her face.

  “Mmm-hmm.”

  “Why are you looking at me like that?” I ask, putting my empty plate on my coffee table and refilling my wineglass.

  “The better question is, why did I just see panic in your eyes?”

  “Oh, knock it off. You’re crazy.” I try to blow off the absolute panic that’s whipping around inside of me like a tent in a windstorm.

  “I don’t think I’m crazy at all. I’ve seen how you look at him. And more so…how he looks at you.”

  My head spins to look at her. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. He doesn’t look at me in any particular way. We’ve been friends for so long, Ella. That’s it.” Even though the thought of Cole and me has crossed my mind more times than I’ll admit to anyone.

  “Whatever you say. But I’ve seen pictures.”

  “What pictures?” I ask, nearly choking on the chocolate I shoved in my mouth.

  “Pretty much any picture that was ever taken that had you and Cole in them. Zayn has photo albums that date back to when you were teens. And in almost every one of them, all eyes are facing the camera. Except Cole’s—he’s looking at you.”

  “That can’t be true. I think you’re looking at this totally wrong. He’s just protective over me, and that’s it. There is nothing there, I promise you that.”

  “Then just so we’re clear, you’re fine with the guys setting him up?”

  A wave of nausea flows through my body, and I swallow hard, trying to rid my throat of the hard lump that showed up out of nowhere. “Of course. But something like that shouldn’t be sprung on him.”

  “I agree, but I was sworn to secrecy.”

  We look at each other and start laughing. “You’re doing a real good job keeping it a secret.”

  She covers her mouth. “You don’t count. They know I tell you everything.”

  “Well, I’m about to tell them to back off.”

  “I bet you are,” Ella says.

  “I don’t know what you’re insinuating by that, Ella Gowers, but I don’t think I like it.” I suddenly feel uncomfortable, and the temperature in the room raised at least a few degrees. It could be this wine.

  “Oh, before I forget, Zayn asked me to remind you about lasagna night on Sunday.”

  “I completely forgot to tell him Levi and I are coming.”

  “Saige is going to be so excited she won’t be the only kid amongst all the adults.”

  “Is everyone coming? I know Jaxon and Holly said they were coming.”

  She nods. “Everyone is coming. River and Kalina, Jaxon and Holly, you two, and Cole.” An evil grin spreads over her face.

  “This is going to be a thing with you now, isn’t it? I’ve known these men my whole life. If Cole had any sort of interest, he would have acted on it by now. From what I see, he’s just one of my best friends and nothing more.”

  “If you say so,” she says, shrugging. “But from what I see, Cole doesn’t look at you the same way you think he does.”

  “And I think you’ve had too much wine.”

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Cole

  Standing in Zayn’s large kitchen as I watch Steph cut the vegetables for the salad she brought over in a big plastic bowl feels like an exact replica of the last lasagna night we had here. Only things were much different then. Ella was in danger, and we were all still a bit on edge after what happened to Kalina. Even though we weren’t aware of all the details and what Ella was facing, there was a different feeling in the air. Tonight feels like a party. A celebration.

  Saige and Levi run into the kitchen to grab more pretzels out of the bowl Zayn set on the kitchen island for them and then giggle together as they run back into Saige’s bedroom. Zayn hands me a stack of plates, and I turn to put them on the expansive dining room table. I spot Jaxon resting his hand on Holly’s still mostly flat belly, and he kisses her cheek before he reaches for the silverware to put them out too.

  Ella starts passing Kalina a few beers from the fridge when her eyes land on me. She shakes a beer in the air toward me, and I nod. She gives me a strange look that I can’t quite read, but it only lasts a second before she buries her head in the fridge again. Holly reaches for the potholders to pick up one of the giant lasagnas that Zayn placed on the counter, and I practically snatch them out of her hands.

  “I’ve got it. You sit,” I say, picking up the heavy dish.

  “Are you kidding me, Cole? I’ve been sitting all damn day.”

  “Well, sit some more.” I take the dish and walk it over to the table, placing it in the middle.

  Something crashes in Saige’s room, and River, Jaxon, Zayne, and Ella go flying across the room, disappearing into the hallway. If I had been closer, I would have been the first one in there, but I know that too many people trying to help all at once can cause more harm than good. Besides, I know the three of them can handle whatever is going on, and if they can’t, they’ll call for me. I grab the second lasagna dish from the island as Steph stands frozen with her ear cocked toward the hallway.

  “No one is crying, so I’m sure everything is fine.”

  Then a high-pitched scream from a man nearly pierces my ear as Zayn comes bulldozing at a record pace across the living room, through the kitchen, and he disappears into the bedroom. I’d be concerned if an entire room of laughter wasn’t accompanying his scream.

  “What the heck is going on?” Kalina asks as River appears with a red face from laughing so hard.

  “Saige accidentally tipped over her spider’s house.”

 

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