The hawthorne brothers a.., p.50
The Hawthorne Brothers: A Complete Billionaire Romance Collection, page 50
“What happened?”
“I told Joel.”
I stiffen. Told him what? That I bought lingerie? That she suspects I’m sleeping with someone?
Wait. She doesn’t suspect that I’m with Ryker, does she? Did she tell Joel that? If so, I’m in deep shit. Both Ryker and I are.
I swallow the lump in my throat. “What did you tell him?”
“What you told me to tell him. That I’m tired of doing everything by myself and I need his help.”
“Oh.” So that’s what she told him?
Thank goodness. No. Not thank goodness. Natalie is crying. There’s a crisis going on here.
“Let me guess. He didn’t take it well?”
“No. We…” Natalie stops and sniffles.
“It’s okay,” I tell her. “Everything will be okay. Just take a deep breath.”
“We said things to each other and then he left. He stomped out the door with just his coat and his keys and he left.” She sobs. “Oh, I knew this was going to happen.”
And I guess she’s partly blaming me for it because I’m the one who told her to talk to him.
“Don’t worry,” I tell her. “I’m sure Joel just went out for a drive. I’ll call him. I’ll talk to him.”
“No,” Natalie says. “I need you here or I’m going to fall apart. I don’t know what I’m going to do. Where are you?”
“I’ll be right there,” I assure her as I look around for my clothes.
I see them folded on the couch where I left them. I reach for my jeans.
“I’m on my way. Just… stay put and try to stay calm. I’ll be right there.”
I end the call and toss the phone on the couch. As I slip into my pants, I notice Ryker watching me.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him. “I have to go.”
“Who was it? Natalie?”
I nod. “She and Joel had a fight.”
I button my pants.
“I have to go and make sure she’s alright. If Joel calls, will you…?”
I don’t finish my sentence because the doorbell rings. I freeze, but Ryker looks even more terrified. His face is pale.
He doesn’t think that’s Joel, does he?
A second later, I hear a voice.
“Ryker? You in there?”
My jaw goes slack.
Fuck.
Chapter Twelve
Ryker
It’s Joel.
I know it is. I’d recognize that voice anywhere. He’s probably here because of the fight with Natalie.
“Ryker?”
What do I do? I can’t just ignore him. He’s my best friend. He came all the way here. He needs me right now.
I look at Claire, who still has that naughty red chemise on over her jeans, which aren’t even zipped. Her hair is all over the place.
If I answer the door, Joel might see her. No. He will see her. And he’ll know what Claire and I have been up to, that I’ve been sleeping with his little sister.
And this is not how I want him to find that out. In fact, this is the second worst possible scenario for him finding out, only slightly better than him walking in on Claire and me actually having sex.
Joel knocks on the door. “Ryker? Are you there? Can you hear me?”
“Give me a minute!” I answer.
At least that should give me some time to think. And keep him from breaking down the door.
Now, think. What do I do? What should I do?
Claire walks up to me and touches my arm. “Hey. It’s fine.”
I put a finger to my lips.
She whispers in my ear. “I’ll go hide in your room. In your closet. You make him leave.”
I look at her with furrowed eyebrows. “Make him leave?”
Does she understand what she’s asking me to do? I can’t let him know I’m here and open the door just to ask him to leave. He’s in trouble. He needs me.
“Or leave with him,” Claire says. “Yeah. That’s better. Get him away from here and then send me a message when you’re in the car so I can leave.”
Just then, her phone beeps. We both look at it.
Claire sighs. “I can’t stay here. Natalie needs me.”
And Joel needs me.
“Ryker?”
I frown. Has it been a minute already?
“One second!” I shout.
Then I turn to Claire.
“Go.”
I don’t know if her plan is the best, but right now, I can’t think of another one.
She grabs her clothes and her purse and her phone. I grab her shoes and hand them to her.
“Go.”
She runs off into my bedroom. The door closes.
Phase One complete. On to Phase Two.
“Ryker?” Joel shouts again.
“I’ll be right there!”
After I put a sweater on to hide my crinkled shirt, which I tuck into my pants, which I check to make sure aren’t stained, I look around.
No panties. No…
I see the torn condom packet on the floor. I pick it up and quickly throw it in the trash can—only to remember what else I threw in there.
I can’t risk Joel seeing that. I grab the whole can and hide it in the broom closet.
“Ryker?”
I look around just one more time to make sure I haven’t missed anything, which is when I notice the empty glass at the end of the kitchen counter with a lipstick stain on the rim.
My eyebrows furrow. That was there the whole time? Well, Claire did say she was waiting for a while. I’m surprised it didn’t fall off earlier.
I ditch it in the kitchen sink before rushing to the door. I open it.
“Joel.” I force a smile. “I’m sorry. I… just came home from work and I had stuff to do.”
He nods. “It’s okay.”
Without me inviting him, he steps in just as he usually does. My shoulders go stiff.
“I haven’t been here in a while,” he says as he looks around. “It hasn’t changed much.”
I draw a deep breath and try to relax.
Just act normal, Ryker. And hope he doesn’t go into the bedroom.
“Why would I change it?”
He shrugs. “Yeah. I guess if it works for you, there’s no point in changing it. It’s your apartment, after all.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “So what’s up? Is everything okay?”
“No.” He sits on the couch.
Thank goodness Claire and I didn’t have sex on that.
He lets out a sigh as he stares at the ceiling. “Natalie and I had a fight.”
“A fight?” I stand over him. “I can’t imagine you and Natalie being in a fight.”
“Well, we are.” He folds his arms behind his head. “We haven’t really fought before. We disagree sometimes, you know, but then we talk things through and someone gives in and we forget about it. But now we are. Fighting. A real fight. Natalie just started shouting—I didn’t know she could shout like that—and then she started crying, like big tears streaking down her cheeks. And I tried to explain myself and make her feel better, but no matter what I said, it didn’t seem to reach her. And so I left. And now I feel terrible and I don’t know what to do and—”
Suddenly, a phone rings. And I know it isn’t mine.
“That must be yours,” Joel tells me. “Because I turned my phone off.”
I realize the ringing is coming from the bedroom. Fuck.
“Yeah,” I lie.
What’s another small lie now?
“You have another phone?”
What?
I turn around to see where he’s looking and notice that I’ve left my phone on the dining table. It’s right next to my wallet.
Fuck.
“Yeah, I do,” I say as I touch the nape of my neck.
Why couldn’t I have told Claire to turn her phone off?
“No, you don’t,” Joel says.
I freeze.
He grins. “That ringtone. It sounded like Taylor Swift. I know because Claire plays her songs all the time.”
I really am fucked.
Joel glances at the bedroom door. “You have a woman in there, don’t you? That’s why it took you so long to let me in.”
“I don’t,” I tell him. “I…”
He gives me this look that lets me know he knows I’m lying.
I straighten my shoulders. “There was one, but she just left.”
Still a lie, but hopefully a more convincing one.
Joel narrows his eyes at me. “Really?”
I nod. “The reason I took so long to get the door was because I was putting my clothes back on.”
“She left you in a hurry?”
“Yeah. She had some kind of emergency. I guess that’s why she forgot her phone. I’ll make sure to give it back to her later.”
“Shouldn’t you give it back now?”
“It can wait,” I say. “Right now, you need a drink.”
And I can’t bear to be in this apartment a second longer. Plus Claire probably needs to get going, too. Maybe that was Natalie calling her, telling her to hurry.
I grab my coat, my phone, my wallet and my keys. Joel stays on the couch.
“You sure you’re not busy?” he asks.
“Nope.” I slip on my shoes.
“And you can leave? That woman won’t come back here looking for her phone?”
“I don’t think so. And even if she does, you and I are still going for drinks. And you’re going to tell me all about this first fight and we’re going to figure out how to resolve it.”
Joel nods. Finally, he gets off the couch. He puts a hand on my shoulder.
“Thanks, bro.”
I pat his back and usher him out the door. “Let’s go.”
~
As soon as Joel and I get inside my car, I consider sending Claire a message like she asked, but I decide it’s too risky. I’ll just have to hope she realizes we’re gone and leaves herself.
I drive. The further we get from my apartment building, the calmer I get. Yes, I’m still feeling guilty because Joel is in the car with me and I can’t scrub the image of Claire in red lingerie out of my head entirely—I still can’t believe she wore that—but at least, there’s no longer any immediate danger of Joel finding out about me and Claire. I don’t want him to find out. I’d rather be the one to tell him myself.
And I will. I was planning on doing it the next time we talked, but clearly, now isn’t a good time. Tonight, it’s about Joel and Natalie.
I listen to him spill all the details about his fight with Natalie over steak and chips and glasses of bourbon at our favorite pub. Beer isn’t going to cut it this time. When he’s done, I pat his shoulder.
“It’s going to be fine, bro,” I tell him. “You think it’s worse than it is because it’s your first fight, but it’s probably not that bad.”
Joel narrows his eyes at me. “You think I’m overreacting?”
“I didn’t say that. I’m just saying the first is always the hardest.”
“Are you saying there are more fights to come?”
I shrug. “I’m sorry to say this, bro, but yes. You and Natalie will have many more fights to come. That’s what couples do. They fight sometimes. It’s normal. It’s part of the process of working things out and figuring out how to stay together. I’m actually surprised you and Natalie haven’t had a fight until now.”
Joel’s eyebrows furrow. “But I thought you said you can’t imagine us fighting.”
Right. I did say that.
“What I mean is I can’t imagine the two of you not getting over a fight. You’re an amazing couple. You love each other.”
Joel shakes his head. “I’m not sure if she still loves me. Maybe she doesn’t want to marry me anymore.”
“Bullshit. Natalie’s not like that.”
“But I made her cry, Ryker. I’ve never made her cry before.”
“She cried because she loves you,” I tell him. “And you know what? I bet right now, she’s waiting for you to come back.”
Joel looks at me. “You think so?”
I take a sip of bourbon. “I know so.”
I’m sure Claire has managed to calm Natalie down by now and talk her into giving Joel another chance. She convinced my building supervisor to let her inside my apartment. She can convince anyone of anything.
“Thanks, bro.” Joel places a hand on my shoulder. “I knew I was right to come to you, not that I really have anyone else to go to. You’ve always been there for me, bro. And I appreciate it. Really, I do.”
And I can see it in his eyes as he gives my shoulder a squeeze. I can see the appreciation, the trust, the care, the brotherhood that we share.
“You really are the best man I know. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
I don’t answer because I suddenly have a lump in my throat, because I suddenly realize something I’ve failed to see until now.
If I tell Joel about me and Claire, I won’t just lose my best friend. He will lose his, too. And he doesn’t deserve that. He doesn’t have any brothers. I’m the closest thing he has to one.
I’m his brother. I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want to throw away this bond that we share, that we’ve built over the years. I don’t want him to be alone when he’s always been there for me. I don’t think I can forgive myself for that.
Joel is my brother and I am his. I can’t abandon him.
“Hey.” Joel pats my shoulder. “You’re not going to cry, too, are you? I don’t think I can stand making another person cry today.”
I punch his side lightly. “I’m not going to cry, bro.”
He chuckles but then turns serious. “You know what? It just occurred to me that you and I have never fought either. That’s… kind of cool, right?”
“It is,” I agree.
What we have is cool. And rare. I was a fool to even think of ruining it.
Joel nods. “I’m really grateful you’re here. I told you that, right?”
“Yes, because when you’re drunk, you say everything about ten times.”
He frowns. “I do not.”
I drop the argument and take another sip of bourbon.
“I mean it, though,” Joel says. “I’m glad you’re here. Even if Natalie calls off the wedding, at least you’re here.”
“I’m not going to marry you, though.”
He laughs. So do I. After we calm down, I look into his eyes.
“Trust me,” I tell him in a serious tone. “Natalie isn’t going to call off the wedding.”
Chapter Thirteen
Claire
“I’m not going to call off the wedding,” Natalie tells me as she hugs a pillow to her chest on the couch.
She still looks upset, but at least her tears have dried.
“It never even crossed my mind. I just want Joel to help me out a little, to have an opinion every now and then instead of leaving all the decisions to me simply because I know better and he loves me.”
“And did you tell him that?” I ask her before taking a sip from my cup of coffee.
“Yes. But he didn’t seem to understand me. He said he thought I left my job so I could work on the wedding, because I wanted to work on the wedding. He didn’t ask me to do it. Then he said I didn’t have to make any decisions, that I could just let the wedding planner do everything. But that’s not right, is it?”
I nod. “Basically, Joel doesn’t want to make any decisions.”
“I’m not asking him to make any decisions. I’m asking him to have an opinion, to care. I told him I just wanted him to care more about the wedding and then he started accusing me of thinking he wasn’t good enough, saying that maybe I should just find someone else to marry.”
“That’s because he’s afraid he’s not good enough for you,” I tell Natalie.
She gives me a puzzled look. “Why would he think that?”
“Because he’s been overlooked by women before? You know, my brother didn’t go on dates, mainly because he was busy studying and taking care of me. Girls didn’t throw themselves at him. He doesn’t see himself as the catch that you see him to be. And here you are. You’re beautiful. You’re smart. You’re kind. You love him. For him, you’re too good to be true.”
“But I’m only human,” Natalie says. “I don’t want Joel to worship me. I want him to love me and be by my side and tell me what’s on his mind.”
“And you told him that?”
She pauses. “Not tonight, no. But I thought he knew.”
I shake my head. “When Joel comes back, tell him that. Relationships aren’t guessing games. You can’t assume the other person just knows things. And you can’t just make your own assumptions about what the other person thinks or feels. You’re not mind readers. You’re partners. You should tell each other things.”
Natalie nods. Then she gives me a worried look. “But what if Joel doesn’t come back? His phone is still off.”
“He probably just wanted space so he could think,” I tell her. “He’ll come back.”
Even if it means I have to drag him back here myself. It’s bad enough he left without talking things through with Natalie. Then again, it’s also a good thing he left instead of ending up saying things he didn’t mean, and hopefully he’ll have calmed down and gained some perspective when he comes back. Whatever the case, he’d better come back.
“You think so?” Natalie asks me. “You think he’s okay?”
“I think so.”
I know so. I know he’s with Ryker right now, even though Ryker didn’t send me a message to let me know so. They’re probably at some bar drinking and talking.
I hope they’re not talking about me. Surely Ryker isn’t going to tell Joel about us when Joel is going through something bad? He knows better than that.
But what if Joel figured it out? I mean, my phone did ring when I was hiding in the closet. What if Ryker had no choice but to tell Joel the truth and he’s already ended up in the hospital?
The sudden worry sends me reaching for my phone. No message from Ryker. Should I call him? But what if I’m wrong? What if he’s just drinking with Joel and Joel still doesn’t know about us?
I decide to just send him a message.
Everything OK?
“If you’re worried, I’m going to start worrying, too,” Natalie says.
